The 2016 NASOMA regular season wrapped up today.
In the post season, the first round features the #3 seeded Warpigs vs the #6 Wahoos, and the #4 Sidewinders against the #5 Zaps.
The Fungoes earned the #2 seed and a bye. The Mavs had the best record in the league; they'll be seed #1.
The playoff date (I think) is November 19th. I'm still not sure where the games are being played. The Zaps can't make the trip, but the Snakeman will be flying in because flicking the bean away from home is way more enjoyable. He'll play his series with the Zaps via TeamViewer.
The Draft Order for the first the non-playoff teams is...
1. Buckeyes (It takes work and talent to lose this many games.)
2. Killer Bees (I wonder who will be available for me to draft online in March?)
3/4. FFTs and Drillers (a 20-sided die will be rolled by the commissioner to break the tie - winner picks 3rd in odd rounds and 4th in even rounds. "I only went 5-5 with one damn team this year, and it had to be the Drillers.")
5. Goofs (If I cut Matt Duffy, am I allowed to use this pick to get him back?)
6. Nads (The Nads are picking 6th. This is NASOMAspeak for "best year ever!")
7. DVs (He remains the posterboy for mediocrity.)
8. Tweeners (Finished 5-19 to grab this illustrious spot in the draft.)
9. Inmates (When your team strikes out almost a thousand times more than they walked, pick 9 is pretty much what you deserve.)
10. Rhinos (Wait... 90 wins didn't get me into the playoffs?!? Can I replay those last 5?)
This list, of course, does not reflect any trades.
As a bonus, here is my prediction for picks 11-16...
11. Sidewinders (Win or lose, I love the idea of the Snakeman flying from Kentucky to Dallas to play a guy from Los Angeles via the internet. Nothing has ever made more sense to me or could be a stronger indication of what makes NASOMA so great.)
12. Warpigs (In 14 games, we beat the Wahoos 3 times. How the hell do I now beat him 4 times in 7 games? The answer is, I don't.)
13. Zaps (After beating the Snakes online, the Zapper bows out due to "more important shit to do" and allows the Fungoes to play against his CM. The Fungoes, of course, sweep.)
14. Mavs (They may have been the best team in the league, but this is the Year of the Wahoo.)
15. Fungoes (While watching homer after homer by the Wahoos - and getting shut out twice by Arrieta, the Fungoes spend the remaining time reminding the Wahoos how to spell Fungoes since he'll be having it put on the Higdon in 2018.)
16. Wahoos (It's not often that a 24-year plan comes to fruition right on time like this. All Hail the Wahoos!)