Friday, August 29, 2008


In series played the last couple of days...

Buckeyes 3, Sidewinders 2
Buckeyes 4, Zaps 1
Zaps 3, Oilers 2
Drillers 3, Oilers 2

The Buckeye lead in the MFD stretches to two and a half games over the idle Inmates. They appear to be making their run.

Only the Zaps, Nads, Inmates, and Wahoos have yet to reach the 120 game mark. Sunday is the last day of August. Get er done!

Tuesday, August 26, 2008


My internet is down. I have had it with Time Warner and am in the process of changing over to AT&T. Unfortunately, I won't have access to the internet thru them for a couple of weeks. And to make matters worse, Yahoo mail is blocked at school (as is gmail and Big Innings - oddly, I can get to Yahoo fantasy sports with no problem).

I am updating from a friend's house tonight, and I'll continue to do this every couple of days until I am set at home.

Keep sending in your results. And remember, the end of August is coming up soon. You must be at 120 games by then. Most of us are already there.

I'll put up another poll later, too.


The Buckeyes moved into first place in the MFD by taking 7 of 10 from the Fungoes.

The report from the FungoDude...
Fungoes and Buckeyes squared off today at Fungoland. Fungoes won the first two contests before rolling over and winning only one of the last eight.

Fungoes win game one, 4-2 while Iguchi hits 2 HRs. Washburn gets the win while Riske picks up the 2 inning save.

Game two goes to the Fungoes, 4-3 with Kevin Cameron picking up his second win of the season. Papelbon earns his 34th save. Fernando Rodney takes the loss.

Buckeyes win game three, 12-1. Greg Maddux picks up the win. Washburn takes the loss.

Game four goes to the Buckeyes, 8-4. Chuck James earns the win while the Buckeye pen begins to work magic on the Fungoe bats! Wakefield takes the loss.

Game five is another Buckeye win, 5-1 in 11 innings. Riske gets the loss, while Soria picks up the win in relief. Mark Grudzielanek ripped 2 homeruns and had 4 RBI for the Bucks.

Buckeyes win game six, 3-2. Papelbon blows a save in the ninth. Buckeyes tie it up in the ninth and win it in the tenth. Riske takes the loss while Soria picks up another win in relief.

Buckeyes blow a four run lead when Sizemore hits a Grand Slam to tie it up in the 8th inning. Buckeyes however, win it in the bottom of the ninth when Jack Wilson hit a walk-off single giving Riske the loss in relief. Darren Oliver gets the win for the Buckeyes.

Fungoes get a much needed win in game eight, winning it 5-4. Fungoes and starter Jarrod Washburn blow a four run lead but get the win with a ninth inning solo Homerun off the bat of Khalil Green. Cameron gets the win while Papelbon picks up a save. Jesus Colome gets the loss.

Jarrod Washburn starts game nine and scatters 2 hits over nine innings, but it is not enough. Schilling, Oliver and Soria share the shutout as the Buckeyes win it 1-0. Schilling gets the win and Soria the save. Buckeyes score their one unearned run in the first when Berkman makes a critical error.

Buckeyes finish off the Fungoes with another shutout in game ten. This time the Bucks win 4-0. Halladay takes the loss. Randy Johnson gets the win while Colome, Cordero and Rodney assist with the shutout.

Saturday, August 23, 2008


The Wahoos trade their ballpark, the Reservation, to the Warpigs. In exchange, the Wahoos will receive the BallPork.


The Sidewinders and Tweeners split four games.

From the Snakeman...
Peavy shut the Tweeners down in game 1 by a score of 5-1. Snakes won a slugfest in
game 2 8-7. The last two games were chinese water torture- The tweeners won
both one run games in extra innings. We have played an identical number of
games(123) and are out of range for demerits for this month.

In a rarity, the Warpigs won a game from the Wahoos, keeping the Wahoos from moving into a first place tie with the Rhinos. The Pigs came back from a 4-0 deficit to win the road game 7-4.

The Wahoo scored one in the 1st and three more in the 4th; and, with Cole Hamels coasting along with a 1-hitter, seemed to be in control. But a 2-out Delmon Young single in the 5th got the Pigs on the board. And when Albert Pujols homered to lead off the 6th, the Pigs were within two. Mark Ellis doubled and Kelly Johnson walked, chasing Hamels. Justin Speier came in and got pinch-hitter Wilson Betemit to bounce into a double play, but Ryan Church followed with a 2-run homer to tie the game.

That led to the Pigman bringing in Joba Chamberlain. Joba pitched four scoreless innings, and when Kelly Johnson wrapped a 3-run, 2-out Jon Rauch pitch around the right field foul pole in the 7th inning, the Pigs had their rare win.

Said Wahoo manager Garth Iorg, "I really only played this game today because it was going to be a gimme win and a tie for first place. This loss really sucks, and I'm not even sure it counts. I mean, come on... Ryan Church? Kelly Johnson?!? Be serious. Those aren't real baseball players. I mean, hell, Kelly is a friggin GIRL'S name, for Chrissake! And pitching Joba Chamberlain FOUR innings? WTF?!? That's just not right. We're appealing this game based on the fact that... well... that it just isn't fair!"

In DV-Land, the DVs took 5 out of 7 against the FFTs. The DVs increased their small lead over the Drillers to 2 games. The FFTs became the first team to finish their season, going 63-99.

Said FFT manager Colonel Reb, "Thank Gawd."

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Demerit Thoughts

Thanks for the feedback on the Demerit rule.

The way I see it, there are four areas that require demerits for not doing your, well, duty:

1. not playing your games on time (and this includes sending instructions for mail games)
2. not reporting your results to your opponent and the webmaster
3. not sending results from games to your opponent (or not sending them to teams who used your computer for their games)
4. not getting your stats done

With regards to #1, this has only really been an issue this year with the Zapper. But it does bring up an interesting point: Is it fair to penalize a team who falls a game or two short of the goal the same as a team who is 100 games behind? I say it is not. I think we should adjust the penalty to reflect the difference. Something like... 1-20 games short of the goal = 1 demerit; 21-50 games short = 2 demerits; 50+ games short = 3 demerits.

And really, this shouldn't even be an issue as almost everybody has done a great job getting the games done on time. Unfortunately, the Zapper has been busy undergoing penile enhancement surgery and has been, therefore, unable to keep up with the torrid pace.

As for #2, this hasn't been much of an issue. All you have to do is email me the results of your series - not the stats. Please, I don't want your stats. But just email me and your opponent the W/L record of your series as soon as you finish playing it. Or CC me when you send your opponent his results. A series summary is great and makes nice copy on Big Innings, but isn't required. Just the records will do. It doesn't matter how you do it... just do it (A catchy slogan - it's a wonder it has never been used).

The biggest issue is #3. Let's ignore for a minute the games on your computer that don't involve your team. But in games you play, send stats immediately to your opponent. Easy enough, right? But if you don't, it shouldn't call for a demerit right away. For one thing, I won't know about it since you aren't required to send ME the stats. Right now if a team emails me that they are missing stats from you, I have been assigning a demerit as per the rule. Let's change that and do it like this: If you are missing stats from a team, first contact them and ask for the stats. If that doesn't solve the problem, email me and I'll contact the other team and ask for them. If that doesn't solve the problem, THEN a demerit is issued.

So, let's say the Fungoes and Wahoos play 5 netplay games at the Reservation. A week later the Fungoes haven't received the stats. Even though he knows he went 2-3, he needs the game files to do his stats. First, the Fungoes call or email the Wahoos and remind him he needs to send the stuff. If the Wahoos then send everything, all is well. If he does not, then the Fungoes call or email me. I'll call or email the Wahoos with a second reminder. If stats are sent then, cool. If not, a demerit is issued along with another reminder. And I think we could keep giving demerits until the guilty party gets off their lazy ass and takes care of business.

This way, the time frame is really up to the team waiting on the stats. If you played the games two months ago but just now remembered that you haven't received the stats, it doesn't matter. You contact the other team and if they send them, it's all good. This process probably would have saved the Rhinos from the buttload of demerits he got this summer.

As for games played between teams on a third team's computer, the Driller Dude is correct that it shouldn't be the laptop guy's responsibility. (Warpigs and Wahoos both get demerits here for acknowledging a good point by the DD.) If you play a game on someone else's laptop, either bring a flash drive or, at the very least, compile a file folder of the game files (or subsets or box scores or whatever you want) on the desktop of the laptop when you finish to make it easier for the laptop owner to send you the stuff you want. If you can email the folder to yourself right then, great. If that's not possible, at least the folder is ready to go and the laptop owner can send it to you later.

No issues yet for #4, of course, but be aware that it's 5 demerits for not getting your full stats turned in to the Chief on time. (By the way Zapper, the "Chief" is the Wahoos.)

And finally, the demerit consequences I listed on the previous entry seem pretty fair to me. I'll plan on switching the numbers on the Constitution if there are no objections.

And for the record, the decision we made at the draft this year was that the Demerit Rule passed with two conditions: 1) the consequences would not take affect until the 2009 season (for the 2010 draft), and 2) the exact numbers would be adjusted and ironed out during this season, which is what we are doing now.

Speak up if you have any objections to any of this. Your silence indicates approval. You can, of course, voice your approval too.


The Oilers went 2-1 via netplay tonight vs the Inmates. The Inmate lead in the MFD is down to 1.5 over the Buckeyes and 2.5 over the Nads.

Love these pennant races!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008


The FFTs trade Jeff Kent to the Zaps for Akinori Iwamura.

Saturday, August 16, 2008


Here are the current consequences for demerits:

(these start in 2009)
0-2 demerits: no consequence
3 demerits: you are limited to a max of 20 players at the March cut down.
4 demerits: you are limited to a max of 18 players
5 demerits: 16 players
6 demerits: 14 players
7 demerits: 12 players
8 or more demerits: 10 players max

We had talked about altering it a bit. How about this:

Consequences (these start in 2009)
0-2 demerits: no consequence
3-4 demerits: you are limited to a max of 20 players at the March cut down.
5-6 demerits: you are limited to a max of 18 players
7-8 demerits: 16 players
9-14 demerits: 14 players
15 or more demerits: 12 players max


The Buckeyes trade Alfredo Amezaga to the FFTs for Ryan Garko.

The Buckeyes trade Ryan Freel and Aaron Boone to the Warpigs for Edwin Jackson.

Friday, August 15, 2008

The Zapman Cometh

The Zaps came through town today.

To celebrate the reclusive manager's rare public appearance, the Driller Dude, the FFTs, the Buckeyes, the Big Chief, and the Pigman joined the Zapper at Babe's for some good eatin'.

Pigman: Hey, let's get somebody to take our picture and I'll put it on the website.

Zapper: We have a website?


The Drillers went 3-2 at home against the Oilers to move within a half game of first place in the NERDD.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008


The Sidewinders went 4-1 at the Mavs.

The Wahoos went 2-0 against the FFTs to complete the five game sweep.

From the Chief...
Scores of the 5 games: 11-3, 6-5, 8-6 and the last two today at my park were 10-4 and 6-5.
In game 5, it appeared the FFTs were bound to win a game. They got hit after hit and battered around their former teammate Gil Meche for 10 hits in less than 4 innings and scored 4 runs off him. The Wahoos loaded the bases a couple innings later and I thought, ok Justin Morneau, tie this thing up. So he did. It was 4-4 until the 12th. Carlos Marmol gave up a run and then Mariano Rivera came in. Dustin Pedroia rolled in his 3 column for a hit. Then Kevin Youkilis rolled a ballpark homer. AND he got the 1 to win the game.

The Wahoos move to within a half game of the Rhinos in the BUD.

The FFTs have only 7 games remaining, all against the DVs.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008


The Drillers took 3 out of 5 against the Sidewinders.

From the Driller Dude...
go 3-2 vs Snakes without Bonds, Ellsbury, or Lincecum.
Hal was kind is all I can say.

The Drillers are within 1 game of the NERDD-leading DVs.

The Inmates and Oilers split a pair of games.

From the HEAD INMATE...
and Oilers split a pair tonight via netplay. Inmates now 60-51.

Cheatin’ Bastage Phillip scored 9 runs in two games – 8 by solo homers! Inmates hit 5 taters, 4 were solos.

The Shell-shocked HEAD INMATE

Monday, August 11, 2008


The Wahoos swept three games from the FFTs today at the Reservation. The Wahoos are only a game and a half behind the Rhinos in the BUD.


The Warpigs trade Jair Jurrjens, Garrett Atkins, and Ian Kennedy to the Killer Bees for Chipper Jones, George Sherrill, and Dan Wheeler

The slow and inevitable deterioration of the human race...


The Zaps took 4 out of 5 at home against the Warpigs.

Sunday, August 10, 2008


The Mavs went 5-2 at home against the Nads.

The Nads drop to 3rd in the MFD, a game behind the Buckeyes and three games in back of the Inmates. The Mavs are now 53-79.

A reminder, when you play a series, you have to report your results to both your opponent and the webmaster. If you don't... DEMERITS!!! Muhahaha!!!

Some people age better than others...

The Tweeners unearthed this great photo of the Oilers and some young punk.


The Inmates traded Rafael Furcal and Orlando Hudson to the Warpigs for Gavin Floyd, Kelly Johnson, Mark Ellis, and Victor Martinez.

Thursday, August 07, 2008


The Wahoos swept two more from the Warpigs today.

Here's the only play I remember...

WP: (runner at first, one out) And here's Pujols to roll another ground ball A and end the inning.
[dice rolling]
WP: 5-4, right
WH: Catcher's X. He's a 4.
[dice rolling]
WH: Passed ball. Runner goes to second.
WP: Great, now Pujols will hafta hit a line drive for a double play.
[dice rolling]
WP: Which he did.

Sunday, August 03, 2008


Drillers 8, Fungoes 6

From the Driller Dude...
Drillers go 8-6 vs fungoes. No blowouts, 3 went extras, and all were filled with stressful excitement.

From the FungoFanatic...
Fungoes dropped the first four vs the Drillers (7-1, 10-5, 3-2 and 7-2) and it looked like the team had checked out. Fungoes managed a 7-6 win in game five but then dropped the next two meetings 3-2 and 7-5. Drillers up 6 wins to 1 after the first seven games. Wakefield and Halladay pulled two wins out (4-3 and 6-3) of the next three game series with the Fungoes losing the finale, 3-0 in 11 innings, to stop the three game sweep at Fungoland. Fungoes very nearly won the last four game set taking the first three games (4-2, 5-3 and 1-0) before losing the season finale with the Drillers 5-3.
Fungoes wind up 6-8 vs Drillers.

Fungoes 5, Inmates 3

From the HEAD INMATE...
We go 3-5 vs Fungoes today via netplay. We were out pitched, out hit, out managed, and out swore..

From the FungoFart...
Fungoes manage to win 5 of the 8 vs the Inmates today finishing 5-5 vs the Inmaties for the Season! Fungoes management however, denies the claim of 'outswearing" the Inmates. Inmates were caught stealing four times in the eight games when they were 1-17 safe or better! The swearing must have been deafening at the Baptiste Bowle!!!

Warpigs 3, Zaps 2

Game 1: Zaps 9, Pigs 7 - Jose Reyes hit a double and two triples - one with the bases loaded - for the Zap victory.
Game 2: Pigs 11, Zaps 5 - Ryan Church hit four doubles. John Lackey gets the win with a 4-inning save from Ervin Santana.
Game 3: Pigs 5, Zaps 4 - The Zaps blow a 4-1 lead. The Pigs scored 2 in the 7th, 1 in the 8th, and ended it with a bases loaded walk to Wilson Betemit in the 9th. A walk off walk.
Game 4: Pigs 6, Zaps 4 - Rich Hill gave up four homers (two to Garrett Atkins) and made 3 errors (three pitcher errors by the same guy in the same game - gotta be a record, right?). Felix Hernandez gets the win.
Game 5: Zaps 12, Pigs 11 in 12 innings - This time the Pigs blew the lead. Down 10-2, the Zaps scored 3 in the 7th and 5 in the 8th to tie it. Both teams scored in the 10th. Josh Hamilton homered off of Chris Capuano in the 12th to give the Zaps the lead. Then it got heated. Zap manager HAL tried to bring in starting pitcher Eric Bedard in the bottom of the 12th to get the save. "My bullpen is empty! My current pitcher is tired! I should be able to bring in this guy and call up a starter to take his place after the game!" Crew chief Tim Donaghy (having bet big money on a Pig win) would not allow Bedard to enter the game, however, forcing Shouse to continue. Zap Manager HAL continued to argue and was ejected, but not before digging up the pitching rubber and throwing it at the feet of Donaghy. (Side note: while digging up the pitching rubber, HAL found the fielding glove of Rich Hill.) Shouse, tired and bloodied, with his pitching arm in a sling and babbling incoherently, still managed to finish the game and claim the win for the Zaps. Warpig captain Albert Pujols, who had been lifted for a pinch hitter back in the 6th inning, commented after the game, "This is bullshit! Saving at bats, my ass! The Warpigs don't deserve a player of my caliber."

Drillers 6, Rhinos 4

The Drillers move to within a game and a half of the first place DVs while the Rhinos' lead over the Wahoos shrinks to 4 games. Things are getting interesting!

Saturday, August 02, 2008

Ranger Program

The Ranger program with the story on Herman is the one currently on sale at Ranger games. It is Vol. 37, No. 8 and is dated July 28-August 3. I bought two copies last night, and my neighbor gave me two more.

Anybody want one?


The FFTs traded Ryan Doumit and Brian Giles to the Warpigs for Francisco Liriano, Chad Gaudin, and the Buckeye first round pick.

Friday, August 01, 2008

Standings Update 8/1/08

B.U.D. W L % GB Remaining Games Last Update
Rhinos 64 54 .542 --
44 7/31/08
Wahoos 55 55 .500 5.0
52 7/31/08
Oilers 47 53 .470 8.0
62 7/31/08
Warpigs 39 81 .325 26.0
42 7/28/08
M.F.D. W L % GB
Inmates 56 45 .554 --
61 7/30/08
Buckeyes 54 49 .524 3.0
59 7/31/08
Nads 56 50 .528 2.5
56 7/31/08
Mavs 48 77 .384 20.0
37 7/31/08
A.W.D. W L % GB
Killer Bees 95 52 .646 --
15 7/30/08
Sidewinders 65 44 .596 11.0
53 7/13/08
Zaps 23 21 .523 20.5
118 4/6/08
Tweeners 54 65 .454 27.0
43 7/30/08
N.E.R.D.D. W L % GB
DVs 75 53 .586 --
34 7/31/08
Drillers 62 47 .569 3.5
53 6/21/08
Fungoes 49 68 .419 20.5
45 7/31/08
FFTs 61 89 .407 25.0
12 7/29/08

Demerit Update

The Zaps get another demerit for not having 100 games played by the end of July.

Speaking of demerits, I see a couple of places we need to get ironed out before next year. First, in the Rhino situation, he got 7 at one time because he didn't send results of 7 different sets of games played on his laptop. But at the same time, those game were only played on his laptop because he allowed them to be. So basically, as Jose said, the lesson learned here is to not let people play games on your laptop. That, obviously, is not what we're after. The teams who played the games need those results, so SOMEBODY has to be responsible for getting them out in a timely manner. Nobody should have to beg and plead for someone to send them their game files. But does it really only fall on the guy with the laptop?

Making this irregularity stand out even more is the fact that while the Rhinos are getting 7 demerits, the Zaps are getting only 1 despite being 55 games behind schedule. That just doesn't seem right. Maybe the demerits you earn for being behind at the deadline could be dependent upon how many games behind you are. Just an idea.

The other issue is this: with the way the consequences chart is currently set up, once you get to 8 demerits, it doesn't matter how many more you get. So the Rhinos with 10 would have no incentive to follow any of the deadlines the rest of the way (including getting final stats turned in). This definitely works against the purpose of this rule, which is to get games played and stats done on time. Any ideas? We can make more steps beyond the 8th demerit, of course. Or maybe even offer a demerit bonus for getting final stats turned in early. Sort of a "buy back" system... or "extra credit."

I'd love to hear your suggestions. I don't want the system to antagonize anyone or cause anyone to get angry and quit; but at the same time, i think we need some sort of guidelines for getting things done. I figure there are three things we can do: (1) Keep it the way it is. Some of the repercussions may seem extreme, but it's not like you don't already know about it. Or (2) make some slight alterations here and there (which is what we agreed at the draft to do.) And, I guess, we could always (3) vote to get rid of it altogether.

Discuss please.