Well, well, well... it's that time of the year again. The MLB season is over, but neither the cards, the ratings, nor the Wahoo stats are here. So it must be NASOMA playoff time.
This year's lineup features the league's oldest and most iconic team as the #1 seed, a team who has been to 3 straight World Series as seed #2, three teams who have yet to win their first title... and the Fungoes.
The Buckeyes, looking for their 8th Higdon, dominated the field in the regular season. He will have the top seed and the home table advantage. Could this be his chance to win his first title since 2005?
The Sidewinders have been on a roll for 4 years now, and is as experienced and playoff savvy as anybody heading into this post season. Will he coast thru the playoffs like he did last year and claim back-to-back titles?
Or maybe this is the year a new team gets its name etched onto the Higdon. The Inmates have been to the Series twice before, but there was a 19-year gap between them. And since his last appearance was only 4 years ago, it seems too early for him to return. It
is, however, the Year of the Inmates. Again.
Or is it the Year of the Wahoos? The Wahoos made the finals once before - in 2000, but more importantly, the Hoos join the Snakes as the only two teams to make the playoffs the last 4 years. Maybe this is the year they finally take the final step.
The Rhinos have also been to a World Series, losing to the DVs
(Editor's note: how embarrassing) in 2012. Maybe 2017 is his chance at redemption - especially since before the season started, the Rhinos traded their best hitter and best reliever
to the DVs, who somehow managed to miss the playoffs anyway while the Rhinos won 98 games. Is this a sign?
The Fungoes slipped into the #6 seed mainly because the Mavs made the mistake of thinking we had passed the rule that allowed the 7th best team to draft #1. The Fungoes have won the Higdon twice before, however, in both 2006 and 2014, so they are experienced at playoff Strat. And any team that gets to pitch Clayton Kershaw has a chance to win (unless that team is the Dodgers).
Without further ado, here are the much lauded, much anticipated, much re-tweeted Big Innings predictions...
First Round - #4 Wahoos vs #5 Rhinos
SP - Even. Fernandez, Verlander, Arrieta, and Estrada for the Wahoos; Syndergaard, Aaron Sanchez, Cole, and Archer for the Rhinos. Maybe a slight edge to the Hoos, but both rotations are elite.
RP - Wahoos. By a lot. Not that Devenski and company aren't good, but the Wahoos have a pen envied by every NASOMA team west of Lexington.
C/Inf - Rhinos. Barely. Votto, Lemahieu, and Bryant make up for the weak-link Story at ss. The Wahoo group is almost as good offensively, and they're better defensively. So it's close.
OF/DH - Wahoos. Not close. The Rhinos didn't win 98 games because of their outfield of Duvall, Buxton, Myers, Kemp, and Marisnick. They won because of their pitching, their infield, and the attention to detail that becomes necessary when you only draft 289 catcher ABs.
Even though the Rhinos won 7 more games than the Wahoos, they are the lower seed because the Wahoos won their division. Head to head, the Rhinos won 7 of 10. But none of that matters. Last year, the Warpigs were clobbered during the regular season by both the Wahoos and Fungoes, but then beat them in the playoffs. Conversely, the Pigs went 9-1 vs the Sidewinders only to get rung up in 5 games against them in the Series.
The Rhinos will get confused when, for the first time this year, they will
not be forced to pinch hit for the catcher every time he comes up. That confusion - along with the Wahoo relievers and the frustration that comes with
NEVER getting a break on an x-chance against the All-One Wahoos - will lead to a Wahoo victory.
First Round - #3 Inmates vs #6 Fungoes
SP - Even. Except when Kershaw is pitching. Really, neither team has a SP (other than Kershaw) who would even make the playoff rosters of the Wahoos or Rhinos.
RP - Even. In an unimaginative, tedious manner. Neither team has an impressive bullpen - or even a shut down stopper. On the other hand, both have useful hurlers who can probably get some outs.
C/Inf - Inmates. Slightly. Rizzo and Altuve win out over Lindor and Murphy, but not by much. Offensively, the Fungoes have a slight edge because of Murphy, but playing Murphy and Carpenter in the field will hurt them at some point. Both teams have great arms behind the plate.
OF/DH - Fungoes. Slightly. Trout and Betts tilt this area to the Fungoes, but the Inmates have CarGo, JD, Cespedes, and Adam Jones. Not too shabby.
Another interesting first round match-up, this one between HWD division rivals. The Inmates went 8-6 against the Fungoes and finished 8 games ahead in the standings. The Fungoes lean heavily on Kershaw and Price, but the Inmates hit LHP well. The Inmates have so-so pitching, but the Fungoes have so-so hitting. Defensively, any ball hit on the ground causes Fungo fans to hold their collective breath while praying that Lindor dashes in front of the other guys to take it. The Fungo scorecard lists Lindor as "Infield Rover."
If this were a 2nd round series complete with days off after games 2 & 5, I'd give the nod to the team that would get to start Kershaw 3 times. But with no off days, the tall Texan can only start twice. Now, the Fungoes
could use him out of the pen so he could pitch every game. This might be the only hope the Fungoes have, but one that is destined to backfire. Limited to 3 innings in each game leaves the Fungoes relying on the rest of a lackluster staff for two thirds of every game. Neither of these teams is better than the two teams in the other first round series, but the Inmates
will be running the prison and
will be victorious in round one.
Second Round - #1 Buckeyes vs #4 Wahoos
The Buckeyes vs the Wahoos lacks the glamour and tension that a Buckeye/Inmate series would offer. And for the Buckeyes, a series vs the Inmates would be preferable. The Buckeyes have been and always will be in the Head Inmate's head. And the Buckeye bats would devour the Inmate pitching staff. BUT... the series is between the Buckeyes and the
Wahoos, and while homers will definitely be flying out of both parks, the Buckeyes can't match the Wahoo pitching. Every game will end 14-12, but the Wahoos will come out on top, advancing to only their 2nd World Series ever.
Second Round - #2 Sidewinders vs #3 Inmates
The Snakes vs the Inmates will have a similar result for a similar reason. The Snake pitching is light years ahead of the Inmate pitching, and the Impotentmates, who can and will score in bunches, won't do it often enough to overcome the mighty Sidewinder machine. The Snakes will join the Buckeyes and Warpigs as the only NASOMA teams to make it 4 straight World Series.
World Series - #2 Sidewinders vs #4 Wahoos
I'd really like to pick the Wahoos, and thereby put extra pressure on him... and the Sidewinders will be fresher, having played fewer games going in.
(Editor's note: Scratch that. The Wahoos are young and spry; the Sidewinders are old and fat. The extra games theory is compromised. Looking back, I can't believe I typed the words "the Sidewinders will be fresher.' The Sidewinders are never fresher.) Both teams have the best bullpens in NASOMA by a wide margin. And, along with the Rhinos and Skyscrapers, the best rotations. When you consider the damn Wahoo defense, it's hard
not to pick the Wahoos. But the difference... the deciding factor... the
key to the series will be a player no longer active in the game. No, I'm not talking about Weekend at Bernie's... I'm referring to Big Papi. Write this down: In his last ever Strat appearance, Ortiz with a game 7 walk-off homer. Sidewinders repeat.
The Killer Bees yanked Colby Rasmus off their cut list and sent him off to the Sidewinders for pick 92.
The Sidewinders clinched the 2018 NASOMA title today - a record for the earliest in the calendar year to win the Higdon.
The Sidewinders obtained Justin Upton from the Mavs today. The leftfielder was a costly acquisition, as the Snakeman gave up Michael Brantley, Starling Marte, and Matt Moore. "We've reached the point where winning the AWD isn't enough - we know that's going to happen," said the Snakeman. "We can only have a successful season if we win it all. And Upton will help us do that."
The best bullpen in NASOMA just got better. The Mavs traded lefty Felipe Rivero to the Sidewinders for a reserve pick in 2018 and a 1st round pick in 2019.
