Are You Mocking Me?

Let's do another Mock Draft! And lemme tell you why... I have figured out exactly how the First Round will go. Exactly. No doubt about it.

So here we go...

1. Buckeyes - Gary Sanchez. Yeah, this pick hasn't changed. The Buckeyes love to play coy with the first pick and surprise us all... and last year he did. But come on... If he did that again this year, he'd be screwing himself. And as the little Wahoo likes to say, "Trust me, screwing yourself isn't as easy as it sounds."

2. Killer Bees - Michael Fulmer. Honestly, this pick gets harder to predict every day. Fulmer is by far the best young pitcher in the Draft. He has innings. He has a great card. He's 24 years old. He's slotted as the #2 guy in Detroit's rotation. There are 3-4 hitters who could go here, but Fulmer is the only starting pitcher worthy of this spot.

3. Drillers - Andrew Benintendi. He has been at the top of most draft boards around the Strat world. He's as sure a thing as there is for the future. The Driller offense keeps getting better and better. A bunch of crappy seasons in a row will do that. You can almost hear Buster Posey in the background yelling, "Take a damn pitcher!"

4. Sidewinders - David Dahl. The dude's a stud. And the SnakePit was built for him. The rich get richer. Last month I predicted Sandy Leon to go here - and the Snakes could definitely use him. But if Dahl's there, he won't get past the Snakes.

5. SuperGoofs - Hunter Renfroe. The Goofs are searching for the young hitter who can make their team better now while still helping the future. But those guys went 1-3-4. Renfroe has the best card in the set. Limited at bats, of course, but his card is Jarrett Parker good. And the Pigs made it to the World Series behind that Parker card. The difference with Renfroe is that he's a legitimate prospect. He'll be hitting 5th every day in the Padre lineup, and he's only 25. He can mash, and he'll fall right into the Goofboy's lap.

6. Nads - Aledmys Diaz. Try as I might, there is no better choice here. Write it down in ink: Aledmys Diaz is pick 6.

7. DVs - Seung Hwan Oh. A month ago, the best relief card was still a tossup. But now that I've seen the cards... and with the DVs trading away the other first round picks they owned, this is the guy. Combine Oh with Kenley Jensen and Addison Reed, and you've got the makings of some serious flicking of the bean come playoff weekend while the Wahoos and Sidewinders play the Series in the next room.

8. Tweeners - Sandy Leon. The Tweeners have a few needs: C, 1B, LF/RF, bullpen... Josh Bell was a possibility here, but his recent knee surgery sets him back a bit. The Tweener catchers are both in their 30s. It's time to hit the refresh button.

9. Inmates - Alex Bregman. Not everybody is sold on the young Astro third baseman, but the Inmates can give himself a "good pick" for this one. And the chances are low that an Inmate pick will lead directly to Tommy John surgery.

10. Rhinos - Chris Devenski. The Rhinos, as always, will be torn between taking what he needs and taking what he wants. But his team is so good... if he had a bullpen, he'd win the HWD. So Devenski it is.

11. Drillers - Josh Bell. The knee issues don't bother the Driller Dude. This kid can hit the ball a long way, and he'll be a fixture in the Pirate lineup by the end of April. Josh Donaldson: "Seriously?!? Dude!!!"

12. Skyscrapers - Matt Bush. Picking the best reliever is based on what your team needs. This could just as easily be Nate Jones or Edwin Diaz.

13. Rhinos - Nate Jones. Picking the best reliever is based on what your team needs. This could just as easily be Matt Bush or Edwin Diaz.

14. Mavs - Edwin Diaz. Picking the best reliever is based on what your team needs. This could just as easily be Nate Jones or Matt Bush.

15. Wahoos - Jonathan Villar. For the team than has everything.

16. Rhinos - Junior Guerra. Trading Kenley Jansen and Ryan Braun was just a smokescreen. The Rhinos will compete now and later.