Mavs 4, Nads 1

Home field advantage prevails between the Nads and Mavs as the count flips in the RastaDome 4-1 Mavs.

 

Game 1:  According to the box score commentary from HAL:  DAVE's manager was unhappy with his club's recent performance.  'We can't keep losing games' he said.  'It gets to be embarrassing after a while.'  That seemed a little harsh so the Seigel’s Liquor Store Decision of the Game goes to HAL for leaving Wade Miley in to absorb 13 hits.  Mavs 6-3

Game 2:  Mavs were fixing to bitch about losing a game on an X chart single when Grant Balfour imploded in the bottom half.  Questionable decision by HAL to walk Elvis Andrus with two outs and a runner on third to bring up Moss backfired.  Garnered Moss the Chico’s Bail Bonds player of the game award.  Mavs 6-3 in 12

Game 3:  Nads outhit the Mavs but leave ten on base.  The Bonnie’s Brothel Clutch Play of the Game goes to Chase Headley who hit a triple to score Brandon Moss from first base to put the Mavs ahead to stay.  The only way to get him there short of a home run.  Miguel Montero goes 3-3 with a walk.  Mavs 5-2.

Game 4:  This was just a Nads bullpen collapse.  Chico’s Bail Bond Player of the Game goes to Country Breakfast who went 3-4 with a homer and four RBI’s.  Miguel Montero keeps hitting in a losing effort going 2-3 to win the Cash America Pawn Shop Nice Try Award.  Mavs 10-4

Game 5:  Vogelsong’s horrible year continues.  Montero picked up a key hit to move a runner along and considering his play in the whole series, he wins the Chico’s bail bonds player of the game.  Nads 5-3.

Back to School Supplies

Nads 4, Mavs 1

MAVS go 1-4 at NADS –NADS finally wake up and remember how to hit – game files, stats and box scores attached – also CM and rotation (below) for NADS @ MAVS

 

Game 1  -Adrian Gonzalez had 4 hits and 2 RBI and Wade Miley had a complete game as the NADS beat the MAVS by the count of 3 to 1.

 

Game 2 –In a close game the MAVS got by the NADS by the score of 5 to 3. Phil Hughes(3-4) pitched a fine game.  He was reached for 7 hits and 1 walk in 7 innings.  Overall the MAVS out-hit the NADS 11 to 8. 

 

 

Game 3 -Wade Miley had an impressive outing and Josh Willingham hit a homerun and had 3 RBI as the NADS beat the MAVS by the count of 5 to 1.

 

Game 4 – NADS 14 – MAVS 3 In a blowout for the MAVS pitching staff, NAD bats were hot in the 1st inning when they had 5 runs on 6 hits.  The NADS had 21 hits for the game and the MAVS had 12. 

 

Game 5  -  the NAD faithful were treated to an intriguing pitcher's duel.  Doug Fister(9-6) finally bested his MAV counterpart, Ryan Vogelsong (4-6), by the score of 2 to 1.Fister pitched a solid outing.  He allowed 5 hits and no walks in 6 innings with 7 strikeouts.  Josh Collmenter came through with a perfect ninth inning to earn his 3rd save. 

Wahoos 2, Killer Bees 1

Game 1
James McDonald was too hot to handle. 12 strikeouts in a 7-4 complete-game victory for the Bees.

Game 2
Wahoos win 7-3. Derek Norris and DJ Lemahieu each had 2 hits to lead the way for the Wahoos.

Game 3
Wahoos blow a 9-5 third-inning lead (thanks to a 9-run 3rd). But a Ryan Ludwick homer in the ninth leads to a walk-off 11-10 victory for the Wahoos.

Sidewinders 4, Wahoos 1

All games played by CM at the Reservation...

 

Game 1
SSWs use an 8-run 6th on their way to a 13-4 victory. David Wright and Brandon Belt each had 4 hits.

Game 2
Jake Peavy struck out 11. Only 17 hits for the SSWs on their way to a 10-3 win. 4 hits for Brantley this time. Thank goodness for EQA.

Game 3
SSWs do it again. 10-2 this time. They were held to only 15 hits. Trevor Plouffe feels like a dumb ass. He went 0-for-5. Everybody else had at least 1 hit. Lucroy had 4.

Game 4
Whaaat? Wahoos win 4-0. Werth had 4 hits and Seager had 3 hits. SSWs scattered 9 off Anibal and Erasmo Ramirez got the final out.

Game 5
Peavy and Kimbrell dominate. Reddick homered for our only run in the 9th. Every SSWs player had at least 1 hit. SSWs win 4-1.

Fungoes 3, Tweeners 2

It took 2 tries in the 10th inning of game 5, but we finally executed the squeeze on a 1 and 2 count to salvage the split.

6/3 – Fungoes 4, Tweeners 2.  Clayton Kershaw struck out 10 batters as the DEREK FUNGOES defeated the NORM TWEENERS by a score of 4 to 2 at The Hooverdome.

Kershaw(2-3) looked very much in control throughout the night.  He didn't
allow much, just 6 hits and 3 walks in 9 innings improving his ERA from 3.93
to 3.53.  DEREK banged out 13 hits on the night. 

Tommy Milone(8-12) ended up with the loss.  He pitched 7 and 1/3 innings and
surrendered 11 hits and no walks. Kershaw didn't realize how many strikeouts
he was racking up.  When told he had 10 he was obviously surprised, 'No
kidding? Man, I knew that I had a decent total, but I didn't think I had K'd
that many.  Say, that's pretty good, isn't it?'

6/4 – Fungoes 7, Tweeners 6 (10 innings).  The score was knotted at 6 after nine innings.  DEREK won it in the 10th inning.  After two outs Clint Barmes stroked a base-hit, and an error was also committed by The Kung Fu Panda.  Freddy Galvis next to the plate and he doubled.  DEREK finished with 11 hits in the victory. 

The win was credited to Jonathan Papelbon(2-0) who went 2 and 2/3 innings
allowing 1 run. The loss was charged to Santiago Casilla(4-1) in relief.  He
was pinned with the loss despite not allowing an earned run in his 4 and 1/3
innings of work.

6/5 – Tweeners 5, Fungoes 0.  Felix Hernandez(11-15), with relief help from Hisashi Iwakuma, handcuffed the DEREK FUNGOES batters at The Hooverdome in a day game.  The NORM TWEENERS scored 5 runs for the win.

NORM drew first blood jumping out to an early lead in the first inning scoring a single run utilizing 2 base hits.  That was all Hernandez needed.  DEREK was out-hit by NORM, 11 hits to 4. 

Hernandez got help from Iwakuma who earned his 4th save.  The loss was charged to Jordan Lyles(2-1).  By surrending 5 runs in 5 and 2/3 innings his ERA jumped from 2.77 to 3.86.

8/16 – Fungoes 4, Tweeners 3.  Kris Medlen allowed DEREK's manager to rest his bullpen, tossing a complete game and Nelson Cruz had 2 base hits and 2 RBI at The Hooverdome as the DEREK FUNGOES beat the NORM TWEENERS by the count of 4 to 3.

DEREK scored the deciding run in the top of the 8th inning.  Cruz ripped a
base-knock.  After an out was recorded, Daniel Murphy stepped up to the plate
and he was walked intentionally.  Willie Bloomquist then laced a base-knock.
Freddy Galvis dug into the batters box next, but he struck out.  Bloomquist
then stole second base.  DEREK totaled 10 hits on the night. 

The victory went to Medlen(1-1) who went the distance allowing 3 runs.
Santiago Casilla(4-2) was the loser in relief.  He pitched 2 innings allowing
2 hits and 2 walks.

8/17 – Tweeners 8, Fungoes 7 (10 innings).  Catcher Yasmani Grandal homered and scored 3 times as the NORM TWEENERS topped he DEREK FUNGOES in 10 innings by a score of 8 to 7 at The Hooverdome.

The score was tied at 6 after nine.  NORM won it in the 10th inning.  Michael
Morse led off and he ripped a single, and the Flyin' Hawaiian came on to pinch run.  After an out was recorded, Mark Reynolds came up and he doubled.  Then with 2 strikes, Will Venable worked the squeeze play to perfection.  NORM rapped out 14 hits for the afternoon. 

The victory was credited to Drew Smyly(2-2) who went 3 innings, allowing 1
run. Steve Delabar(0-1) ended up with the loss in relief.  He surrendered 2
runs and 2 hits in 1 and 1/3 innings.

Outfield Mastery

I remember watching the A's somewhere around 1989-1992 with an outfield that included Rickey Henderson in LF and Jose Canseco in RF. I'm not sure who the CF was (Dave Henderson maybe?), but I remember watching balls hit to the outfield and the CF would track them down. After he would make the catch, you could look at Rickey and Canseco, and they'd both be standing right where they were when the pitch was thrown. The CF was on his own on any ball hit between straight away right and straight away left. Those two guys had stopped giving a damn about defense a long time ago.

Tonight at the Ranger game, the Mariners are fielding an outfield of Raul Ibanez, Dustin Ackley, and Michael Morse. Is this currently the worst outfield in baseball? Could it be the worst of all time? I'd love to hear your thoughts: What is the worst defensive outfield ever?

Tweeners 3, DVs 2

4/7 – DVs 5, Tweeners 2.  Maholm over Gio, Tweeners never threatened.

4/8 – Tweeners 4, DVs 3.  Tweeners brought 3 runs across the plate in the 4th inning with the help of 3 hits.  The critical plate appearance was by Mark Reynolds who brought the crowd to their feet when he lofted a three-run bomb.  Sergio Romo was perfect in the ninth giving him his 30th save on the season.  Madison Bumgarner(16-9) got credit for the victory, pitching 5 and 2/3 innings and allowing 3 runs. The losing pitcher was Roy Halladay(0-5).  Despite taking the loss, he whiffed 11 batters in 8 innings.

6/29 – Tweeners 4, DVs 3 (10 inn.).  Chris Tillman was dominant, but due to dwindling innings was removed in the 7th with a 2-0 lead.  Casilla and Wright kept the shutout intact, Tweeners added another insurance run, and Romo came in for the save, but DVs refused to concede.  A 2-run homer by Ramirez, a single by Craig, Romo is tired; pinch-runner Kinsler steals 2nd, a dot hit by Hardy forces extra innings.  Bottom of the 10th, LaRoche doubles  off Jake McGee, pinch-hitter Gio Gonzalez bunts him to 3rd, and Eggs Ackley drives him in as Tweeners avoid the disaster.

6/30 – DVs 12, Tweeners 4.  This was like one of those softball games that the DVs host.  MadBum gives up 5 runs before recording an out.  18 hits for the visitors, including 5 by Stanton and 4 by Craig.  We pinch hit for our last catcher in the 9th inning, but fortunately did not achieve the 8 run rally that would have resulted in the embarrassing forfeit.

7/1 – Tweeners 3, DVs 2.  Shades of June 29th.  Gio was strong through 6, pulled due to dwindling innings with a 2-0 lead.  DVs score a run off Casilla, so this time Romo had no margin for error.  Stanton hammered the first pitch in the 9th to tie it.  2 more hits by Trumbo and Ramirez, pinch-runner Cabrera, Romo tired, double steal – but this time we yanked him before they could find his dot, and Steve Johnson put out the fire.  Extra innings were not necessary, Tweeners win in the bottom of the 9th with a Panda double, Shane bunted (and beat it out), one out later it was Zobrist with the walk-off single.

Mavs 3, DVs 2

Game 1 – DV's spank the Mavs. DV's attempt to steal third up 7-1 in the eighth inning. The listless Mavs don't even take it personally.
Game 2 – Mavs win a tight one 6-5. The game winning RBI was by the perennial DV-killer Elvis Andrus with a double in the 7th. Andrus goes 3 for 4. The Chico's Bail Bond player of the game for the DV's is Matt Holiday who went three for four and staggered under two x chart flies and came away with catches.
Game 3 – Craig hits two homers on HR1-2 DO3-20 but it all goes for naught as the Mavs have a big 4-run 7th to win 10-3. The Pandora's 24 hour Porn n Pawn Shop player of the game goes to Howard "not Howie" Kendrick who went 5-5.
Game 4 – five Mav pitchers combine for a four hitter. The DV's throw the Mavs a scare in the 9th when manager Toby Harrah's attention was wandering to the ballgirl by loading the bases with Mav nemesis Alan Craig due up. Crain induced a game ending DP grounder. 6-1.
Game 5 – Going for the much lauded Tweener split HAL pulls Latos with a two hitter in the eighth. The Mavs almost claw their way back in against Cook but fall short. McCann hit two solo shots but there is no doubt that the Chico's Bail Bonds player of the game for the DV's is Latos. 4-2 DV's.

Players to be Named

Two PTBN deals were finalized recently.

In a deal from last January, the Wahoos claim Dillon Gee from the Warpigs as a PTBN. (This explains why Gee has been so damned hot lately.)

Also in a deal from last January, the Wahoos claim Edinson Volquez from the Buckeyes. (Not Kevin Youkilis as previously reported.)

You can see the original deals by going to the Archives Page. All previous deals dating back to 2006 can be viewed there.

The DVs Report Two Trades

The DVs traded Everth Cabrera to the Fungoes for Rick Porcello.

The DVs traded Drew Storen to the FFTs for Jesus Montero.

FFTs and Killer Bees make a trade

The FFTs send Andrelton Simmons and Nick Swisher to the Killer Bees for Starlin Castro and Andre Ethier.

Warpigs 6, Rhinos 1

It just wasn't the Rhinos night...

All games rolled with dice and cards.

Gm1 - Pigs win 9-1. Steven Strasburg (10-5) threw the complete game.

Gm2 - Pigs win 4-2. David Freese hit a 3-run homer, and the Pigs win despite being outhit 10-5. Jordan Zimmermann (14-7) got the win and Fernando Rodney recorded his 41st save.

Gm3 - Pigs win 6-0. Dillon Gee (3-3) and 5 relievers combine for a 2-hit shutout.

Gm4 - Pigs win 3-2. Adam Wainwright (18-3) gets the win. Rodney the save.

Gm5 - Pigs win 4-2. A 3-run homer by Prince Fielder in the 7th added the cushion and made a winner of Strasburg (11-5). 5 relievers were a little shaky, but held on for the win. Rodney got the save.

Gm6 - Pigs win 3-2. Dillon Gee (4-3) won thanks to three solo homers by Lorenzo Cain, Melky Cabrera, and Justin Ruggiano. Rodney got another save.

Gm7 - Rhinos win 2-1. Fernando Rodney (8-1) was obviously tired, blowing a save and taking his first loss of the year. Tim Hudson and Steven Strasburg had matching 1-hit shutouts after 7 innings. Then Edwin Encarnacion homered to break the ice and give the Pigs the lead. Rodney then came on for a rare 2-inning save, but coughed up a homer to ARod in the 8th, and then Braun in the 9th. A somewhat fitting end to a day filled with news of steroid-related suspensions.

In 7 games, the Rhinos could muster only 11 runs on 42 hits.

The Run for the Pennant

And here they come down the stretch...

With (almost) every team at or over the 100-game mark, here's a look at how the teams look heading for the playoffs.

In the BUD, the Warpigs have a healthy lead over the DVs, who trail by 24.5 games. The Pigs have 90 wins with 26 games to play (10 vs Buckeyes, 7 vs Rhinos, 5 vs Wahoos, and 4 vs DVs). The DVs, at 56-61, are good enough to win the AWD, but not good enough to earn a wild card spot.

Projected finish: Warpigs 103 wins

In the aforementioned AWD, the SuperGoofs lead the Tweeners by 5.5 games despite being only 2 games over .500. The winner of this division will most likely be the #4 seed, with the runner-up having a lousy spot in the draft. The Goofs have won 57 with 50 games to play (10 vs Drillers and Rhinos, 8 vs Buckeyes, 7 vs Tweeners, 5 vs DVs, Mavs, and Zaps).

Projected finish: SuperGoofs 81 wins

Down in the AWD, the Inmates have a half game lead over the Rhinos. Although not guaranteed, both teams should make the playoffs. The division winner will either earn a bye or get the #3 seed. The Inmates have 68 wins with 47 to play (14 vs Fungoes, 10 vs Bees and Zaps, 7 vs Rhinos, and 6 vs Tweeners). The Rhinos have 64 wins with 54 to play (10 vs Buckeyes, Drillers, Goofs, Zaps and 7 vs Inmates and Warpigs). The Rhinos have a tough road ahead - 44 of the 54 remaining games are against playoff-bound teams. This will be a great race.

Projected finish: Inmates 96 wins, Rhinos 96 wins

The real chaos, however, comes from the MFD. The Mavs have a lead of 2.5 games over the Buckeyes and 3.5 games over the Zaps. It is indeed possible that all three teams make the post season, but it's more likely one of them will be left out. The division winner will probably get a bye, but there's no certainty of that either. The Mavs have 70 wins with 49 games to play (14 vs Buckeyes, 10 vs Nads and Wahoos, 5 vs DVs, Bees, and Goofs). The Buckeyes have 71 wins with 42 to play (14 vs Mavs, 10 vs Rhinos and Warpigs, and 8 vs Goofs). The Zaps have 71 wins with 40 games to play (10 vs Inmates, Rhinos, Nads, and 5 vs Wahoos and Goofs). The Mavs have the most favorable schedule of the 3 teams, while the Buckeyes have 42 very difficult games remaining - all of them against playoff-bound teams. The 14 head to head games between the Mavs and Buckeyes are huge.

Projected finish: Mavs 104 wins, Buckeyes 92 wins, Zaps 95 wins

It should be an interesting couple of final months. Series to watch:
Tweeners vs Goofs (7) - Could be the Tweeners last chance. Seems like yesterday they were a game away from the World Series.
Mavs vs Buckeyes (14) - The two old warriors have a great showdown ahead.
Inmates vs Rhinos (7) - Mano y mano for the HWD title, maybe.
Zaps vs Inmates (10) and Zaps vs Rhinos (10) - Afterwards we can ask the Zapper which of those two teams is harder to beat.
Warpigs vs Rhinos (7) - The Rhinos have a tough finishing stretch (except against the tanking Drillers), so every series is important.
Buckeyes vs Warpigs (10), Buckeyes vs Rhinos (10), Buckeyes vs Goofs (8) - The Buckeyes definitely have their work cot out for them. Do they still have any of that magic left?

Stay tuned...

Buckeyes 4, DVs 1

Buckeyes host the DVs in a netplay hookup and kick the crap out of them with a 4-1 series beatdown.

Game 1 – Ortiz and Youk hit home runs to stake the Bucks to a 4-0 lead. Giancarlo Stanton nominates himself as hero of the game with a game tying home run in the 7^th. Fate however ultimately decided he was really the goat, as his 3 base error allows the go ahead run to score as the Bucks capitalize with a 4-3 win

Game 2 – Dunn hits 2, 2 run homers in a 4-2 win

Game 3 – Hamels sucks- although his ERA only went up .17 as he allowed 5 ER in 6 IP, so he’s at least leveling off. Buckeyes win 8-5

Game 4 – Buckeyes won – I was on the phone and forgot to write down the score

Game 5 – DVs sack up and actually show some gumption with a 3-1 win as the bullpen throws a ton of innings to do it.

Inmates 3, Warpigs 2

The Inmates leapfrogged the Rhinoids, moving into 1st place in the HWD thanks to a 7-3 day. The final 5 games ended up in a 3-2 thrashing of the Warpigs.

Gm1 - Inmates win 2-1. Brandon Beachy is pretty good. A 2-run homer by A.J. Pierzynski provided the offense.

Gm2 - Warpigs win 5-2. Solo homers by Nate Schierholtz, Prince Fielder, and Yoenis Cespedes helped Adam Wainwright to the victory. Fernando Rodney got his 40th save.

Gm3 - Warpigs win 8-6 in 15 innings. Easily the most interesting of the 5 games. Austin Jackson hit a 2-run homer in the 9th inning to give the Pigs a 6-5 lead. The homer gave Jackson, who had singled in the 1st, tripled in the 3rd, and doubled in the 5th, the cycle. Then in the bottom of the 9th, Adrian Beltre homered off of Fernando Rodney to tie the game. The game stayed tied until the 15th, when John Jaso drew a 2-out walk ahead of a 2-run homer by Edwin Encarnacion. Rodney, the last Pig pitcher, went 7 innings for the win, striking out 11. The last few innings included Jaso catching, Yadier Molina at 1b, Martin Prado at ss, Encarnacion at 3b, and no DH. 26 of 30 Pigs played in the game.

Gm4 - Inmates win 7-6. The Inmates scored 2 in the 8th off of Brad Ziegler for the come from behind win.

Gm5 - Inmates win 5-2. Brandon Beachy is really pretty good. A 3-run homer by Beltre in the 7th was the difference.

Inmates 4, Goofs 1

All games are rolled (with dice) face-to-face!

 

INMATES 6 – GOOFS 3 (all games at Baptist Bowl): Lohse tosses a CG for the Goofs, but can’t recover from giving up a three-spot to the Inmates in the 1^st. The Celluloid Dawgs out-homer the Beakless Chicken Gang 2-1 and get the potential tying run to the plate in the 9^th but can’t break through.

 

INMATES 9 – GOOFS 7: Inmates once again use six pitchers to hold off the Goofs. Darvish throws 7 1/3, allowing all nine Inmate runs before being pulled. Very tight, see-saw game. Goofs score in 1^st to take initial lead, then Inmates score twice in the bottom half of the inning to go ahead 2-1. After scoring two more in the 4^th to re-take the lead, Darvish then allows a 3-run tater to Beltre to let the Inmates go ahead 5-3. Jump ahead to the last of the 8^th with the Goofs ahead now 7-5; Cargo blasts a grand-slammer to put the Inmates ahead for good. Once again the Goofs out-tater the Inmates 3-2.

 

INMATES 4 – GOOFS 2: Eight Inmate pitchers out-duel Villanueva’s CG. Cargo remains hot, hitting a pair of solo homers. Espinosa also homered for the Inmates.

 

GOOFS 4 – INMATES 2: The Goofs finally break into the W column, with yet another complete game pitching performance (this time by Griffin). Inmates led 1-0, then 2-1 before the Dawgs take the lead for good. Teixeira misses 1-11 HR chance in the bottom of the 9^th with two on and two out.

 

INMATES 4 – GOOFS 3 (13 innings): Still another close game. Parker allows all three Goof runs in the 1^st with two outs, then combines with five other Inmate pitchers to shut out the Goofs the rest of the way. Parra hits a walk-off groundout to shortstop with one out and only the corners in and the bases loaded to win for the Inmates.

 

Goofs do well rolling.

 

The HEAD INMATE

Buckeyes 6, Wahoos 4

April 28 - Buckeyes 5 Wahoos 1 - Karstens the win in relief. Buckeyes hit 4 homers (Ross, Hart, Ortiz, Youk)

April 29 - Wahoos 6 Buckeyes 1 - Alvarez throws CG 5 hitter. Reddick, Desmond, and Seager homer

April 30 - Wahoos 4 Buckeyes 1 - Eovaldi throws CG 4 hitter. Desmond homers and Werth has 3 hits.

 

June 8 - Buckeyes 7 Wahoos 5 - Buckeyes tag Buehrle for 6 runs and then hang on for the win.

June 9 - Buckeyes 8 Wahoos 7 - Big Papi goes 2 for 4 with 4 RBI's. Smith gets the win in relief

 

July 22 - Buckeyes 9 Wahoos 4 - Buckeyes hit 5 homers. Youk hits 2 of them. Harrell gets the win

July 23 - Wahoos 9 Buckeyes 8 - Reddick drives in 4 with a 2b and HR. Davis gets the win in relief

 

Aug 21 - Buckeyes 7 Wahoos 5 - Buckeyes hit 3 more homers and Werth gets 3 more hits. Buckeyes can't get Werth or Desmond out.

Aug 22 - Buckeyes 8 Wahoos 6 - Ross drives in 4 as the Buckeyes get 2 in the 11th to win it.

Aug 23 - Wahoos 4 Buckeyes 2 - Desmond hits the walkoff homer in the 9th.

Fungoes 4, DVs 1

Fungoes played mail games vs DVs today, (all games played at WTF), here are the results:

 

June 22:

Fungoes win 3-0 as Harvey, Delabar and Papelbon combine on the shutout.  Papelbon picks up a save for the Fungi.  Halladay gets the complete game loss.  Harvey was stingy on the mound, allowing just 3 hits and 3 walks in 7 innings. 

 

June 23:

DVs win 4-3.  Matt Latos picks up the win for the DVs while Brad Lincoln takes the loss for the Fungoes.  J.J. Hardy was a thorn in the side of the hometown fans as he enjoyed a fine day at their team's expense.  He blasted a solo shot in the 3rd inning, doubled bringing in a run in the 5th inning and doubled in the 7th inning.

September 3:

Fungoes win 4-2.  Kershaw picks up the win for the Fungoes while Lynn takes the loss for the DVs.  Papelbon picks up save number 20. 

 

September 4:

Fungoes win 4-0.  Jordan Lyles picks up the win for the Fungoes while Hammel takes the loss for the DVs. 

 

September 5:  Fungoes win again 6-3.  Porcello grabs a win with help from the bullpen.  Papelbon picks up the save for the Fungoes.  Maholm takes the loss. 

 

Fungoes are hot!  Maybe too late for the playoffs but these guys are winning some games!

 

WTF???

Zaps 3, Fungoes 2

Game One-Medlen tosses a four-hitter to win the first game 4-2.
Game Two-In a back and forth game Zimmerman wins it with a two-run double in the 11th inning as the Fungoes take it 8-6.
Game Three- The Zaps hit three taters of Kershaw the Magnificent and then Delabar gives up the game winning dinger to Middlebooks in the 8th inning as the Zaps take a 9-8 victory.
Game Four- Greinke and Parnell combine on a four-hit shutout as the Zaps even the series with 2-0 triumph.
Game Five- Cabrera hits a three-run bomb to get the Zaps cruising to top the Fungoes 7-2  in the getaway game.

Zaps 3, DVs 2

Game 1-Weaver goes the distance striking out 10 to take game one for the visitors 3-1.
Game 2-DV's use a 3-run 8th inning rally to tie the game before walking in the winning run in the bottom of the 9th as the Zaps win 5-4
Game 3-Halladay goes the distance with the help of Trumbo's two-run pinch hit bomb in a 3-2 DV's victory.
Game 4-Aaron Hill's 2nd home run of the game in the 8th starts a four-run rally that puts the Zaps ahead for good in a 8-5 triumph.
Game 5-Greinke gives up one run in seven innings and the bullpen makes it stand up for a 4-1 Zap W in the getway game.

DVs 4, Tweeners 1

DVs play an interesting series with the Tweeners in what shaped up as an EQA extravaganza – but quickly turned into a grind it out, batter by batter death match.

Game 1 – DVs win 4-1 as Maholm pitches the game of his life.

Game 2 – Coming off the yawner of game 1, the DVs score 5 runs before any outs are recorded and appear to be safely on their way to a big win. So we decide to speed ahead to the top of the 7^th inning with the quick-play feature. WTH? WTF? Tweeners lead  14-11 as they rallied for 5 in the second and completely swamped Halladay with 13 runs in 4 1/3. Tweeners go on to win 24-15! Aoki hits 2 HR, has 5 hits and 9 RBI’s as the Tweeners score in every inning but the first. Welcome to the DVs 2013 season.

Game 3 – Figuring that another ridiculous softball scoring battle was shaping up, we decided to slow down and go batter by batter. 13 FREAKING SCORELESS INNINGS LATER – Holliday hits a walk off home run for a 3-0 DVs win. Interesting quirk was that the Tweeners walked Allen Craig to get to Holliday.

Game 4 – Stop me if you’ve heard this before – Milone doesn’t retire a batter before the Tweeners trail 4-0 and the CM pulls him. Tweeners answer with 4 in the second, then don’t score again as the DVs scratch out a 6-4 win. It was like games 2 and 3 got crashed together.

Game 5 – DV’s move to a 6-0 lead and look to coast into the post game buffet. Wrong – Tweeners tie it at 7 with 5 in the 7^th inning. Somehow the DVs sneak out a sac fly in the 8^th and hold on for a 8-7 win.

Buckeyes 2, SuperGoofs 0

Buckeyes and Goofs roll a couple of games. Buckeyes go 2-0. Results as follows:

 

May 8 - Buckeyes 3 Goofs 1 - Buckeyes only get 5 hits but 3 are solo HR's versus Villanueva. Hamels allows 3 hits in the win.

May 9 - Buckeyes 10 Goofs 4 - Buckeyes hit no homers but pound out 12 hits. Nelson was 2 for 4 with 3 RBI's and Cuddyer goes 3 for 3 with 2 doubles and 2 walks. Josh's 3 run homer was the only big Goof hit.

Warpigs 3, Wahoos 0

Cards and dice.

Gm1 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 9-0. Cliff Lee (12-9) had the complete game shutout, holding the Hoos to 6 hits and walking no one. Brandon Crawford went 3-4 with 3 RBI. Yadier Molina homered.

Gm2 - @ The Reservation - Pigs win 8-4. Molina hit a 3-run homer in the 7th to break open a tight game. Jeremy Hellickson (16-8) got the win. Fernando Rodney recorded his 39th save.

Gm3 - @ The Reservation - Pigs win 10-5 in 11 innings. Prince Fielder hit a 2-run homer in the top of the 9th to tie the game. Then the Pigs exploded in the 11th. Molina singled in the first run, followed by a 3-run homer by Yoenis Cespedes. Nate Schierholtz went back to back with a solo shot. Rodney (7-0) tossed 2 perfect innings for the win.

Zaps 4, Wahoos 1

Game 1- Josh Johnson and Bobby Parnell combine for a 4-0 shutout while
Reyes and McCutchen tater.
Game 2-Jose Bautista hits three out of the park to back a 2-hitter by
the Zaps staff for an 8-0 whitewash.
Game 3-Peter Bourjos hits a two-run pitch hit homer run to power the Zap
comeback for a 6-5 win.
Game 4-Matt Scherzer and Travis Blackley combine on a three hitter while
Miggy and McCutchen go yard in an 8-0 triumph.
Game 5-The bad guys score seven runs in the last two frames to turn a
close game into a 9-3 getaway game W.

Nads 3, Wahoos 2

Game 1: Josh Willingham jacked one out of the ballyard and had 3 RBI as the NADS defeated the WAHOOS by the score of 10 to 2. Doug Fister(8-5) was stingy on the mound, allowing just 6 hits and 3 walks in 8 and 1/3 innings and striking out 9

Game 2: First game of doubleheader – The Wahoos took the lead for keeps in the 3rd inning when they tallied 2 runs.  The highlight belonged to Jayson Werth as he popped a two-run clout over the fence.

 

Game 3: Second Game of doubleheader -With the hometown crowd on the edge of their seats,the NADS came from behind to top the WAHOOS, 5 to 4. The NADS erupted with the game winning runs in the 9th inning with 2 runs on 3 base hits.

Game 4: The WAHOOS put 5 runs on the scoreboard in the 7th inning and had an

easy time of it defeating the NADS by a score of 11 to 3.

 

Game 5: Jared Burton went 4 strong innings as the NADS beat the WAHOOS 2 to 1.

Pig Games in Nashville

All 28 games played with dice and cards.

Gm1 - @ The Hive - Bees win 6-5. I was too busy keeping an eye on the lamp above us... but as the Fungoes didn't make the trip, history did NOT repeat itself.
Gm2 - @ The Hive - Pigs win 9-8. A 3-run double by Yadier Molina in the 7th was the difference.
Gm3 - @ The Hive - Bees win 13-2. Bees had a 6-run inning and a 5-run inning.
Gm4 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 7-1. Adam Wainwright throws a complete game 6-hitter.
Gm5 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 5-3. Pigs warming up. Bees loading up on beer.
Gm6 - @ The Hive - Pigs win 26-5. For the second time in a week, the Pigs score 20+ runs. This time it came on Tim Lincecum Bobblehead Day. Lincecum started for the Bees and went 6 innings, allowing 22 runs on 20 hits (5 home runs). The Pigs scored 11 in the 1st inning, and couldn't let up because the Bee fans were calling for 30. For the game, the Pigs had 26 hits including 4 doubles, 3 triples, and 5 homers. Two of the hitting stars were Martin Prado, who went 5/6 and Justin Ruggiano, who homered in both the 1st and 2nd innings.
Gm7 - @ The Hive - Pigs win 5-4 in 10 innings. Edwin Encarnacion hit a sac fly in the 10th for the win. Fernando Rodney got another save.
Gm8 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 9-3. Yoenis Cespedes hit a 1st inning grand slam. Molina hit 2 homers. Cliff Lee coasted to victory.
Gm9 - @ The BallPork - Bees win 8-5. This breaks a 5-game losing streak for the Bees.
Gm10 - @ The BallPork - Bees win 8-5. Bees score 4 in the 3rd and roll to another win.

Gm1 - @ Hoover Dome - Tweeners win 3-2. Tommy Milone shuts down the Warpigs.
Gm2 - @ Hoover Dome - Tweeners win 6-4. Pigs have now lost 4 in a row.
Gm3 - @ Hoover Dome - Pigs win 9-2. The Warpigs finally solve the riddle of the Hoover. Steven Strasburg goes the distance for the win, allowing only 3 hits.
Gm4 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 6-4. A 3-run homer in the 9th by some Tweener guy forces Rodney to come in for a save.
Gm5 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 11-2. The loss to Milone earlier is avenged. Ruggiano homers twice.
Gm6 - @ Hoover Dome - Pigs win 8-4. A 6-run 4th, capped off by a pinch hit homer by Cespedes, propels Cliff Lee to the win.
Gm7 - @ Hoover Dome - Pigs win 9-5. The Hoover Dome curse is officially broken.
Gm8 - @ The BallPork - Tweeners win 16-5. The Tweeners had 14 hits and 8 walks in the blowout.
Gm9 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 6-0. A rare shutout at the BallPork. Adam Wainwright does the honors, allowing 5 hits and 1 walk in the complete game shutout. This game also broke a streak of 13 games in which the Pig starter had allowed at least 1 home run.
Gm10 - @ The BallPork - Tweeners win 4-2. Pigs have trouble finishing a series again.

Gm1 - @ The Snakepit - Pigs win 5-3 in 11 innings. Aroldis Chapman blows a save in the 9th when Travis Snider doubles in the tying run. Then in the 11th, Chapman gives up a 2-run homer to Molina.
Gm2 - @ The Snakepit - Sidewinders win 3-2. Another lefty shuts down the Pigs. This time it's Matt Moore taking advantage of the huge ballpark. Justin Morneau homered for the Snakes.
Gm3 - @ The Snakepit - Sidewinders win 6-3. You gonna eat that crust?
Gm4 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 6-5. Four different Pigs homer. Strasburg gets the win; Rodney the save.
Gm5 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 10-7. The Snakes erupted for 7 runs in the 2nd inning, including a grand slam by Morneau, but the Pigs fight back with 4 in the 4th and 5 in the 6th. Prince Fielder homers twice.
Gm6 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 11-2. Encarnacion homers twice. Including 2 games rolled at the Draft, the Pigs sweep the Snakes at home.
Gm7 - @ The Snakepit - Pigs win 4-0. 5 Pig pitchers combine for the shutout. The Snake pitchers allowed only 4 hits, but two of them were homers by Molina.
Gm8 - @ The Snakepit - Pigs win 6-4. The Pigs finally finish a series on a strong note, winning their 5th in a row. John Jaso went 3/3 with a homer.

Incidentally, in 28 games, Yadier Molina played in 25 of them. In those 25 games, he scored at least 1 run in 18 games, had at least 1 hit in 21 games, and drove in at least 1 run in 15 games. For the weekend, Molina hit .333 with 25 runs scored, 28 RBI, and 10 homers.

Goofs 5, Bees 2

Game 1: Goofs win 7-1, the charge led by Lewis and Alvarez

Game 2: Alvarez was the only one fighting for the Goofs, as Darvish decides to have a Bees love fest and let 10 guys go for a walk. Bees win 14-3

Game 3: Superb Pitching match up, but Goof Brandon Phillips ends it all with a walk off HR. Goofs win 2-1

Game 4: Goofs win 5-1, Ol' Macdonald tried to send a message to the Goofs by beaming Choo immediately after Pagan homered, but the Goofs just carried on.

Game 5: Colby Lewis throws a 2hit Bees Shut out! Goofs win 1-0 off of Castro a 1-6 single.

Game 6: Brandon leads a 3 run charge, against the mighty bees. Goofs win 8-5

Game 7: Verlander throws an impressive shutout, but the no hitter was shut down by Castro's 1-2 ballpark single.

The Nashville Experience

The Warpigs, Rhinos, Tweeners, Sidewinders, and Killer Bees met up at the Bee Hive this weekend. The Nads and Inmates were scheduled to make it, but apparently the Nadman spent 3 days with the Inmates last week and was flat on his back for 2 of them. I guess the Head Inmate was the one flat on his back the third day. Whatever, neither of them made it to Nashville.

Someone will add game stories later, but here's the rundown so far:
The Rhinos went 7-3 vs the Sidewinders, 6-4 vs the Bees, and 4-6 vs the Tweeners.
The Pigs went 6-4 vs the Bees, 6-4 vs the Tweeners, and 6-2 vs the Snakes.
The Snakes and Tweeners played 2 and split them.

There may be more inter-family games before the weekend is over, but the Rhinos and Warpigs have played all they had to play with the Kentucky/Tennessee boys.

The Loveless Café was great as always.

Fungoes 4, Tweeners 1

Fungoes and Tweeners played 5 games at WTF this morning.  Here are the results:

 

Game 1 April 24:

Tied at 4 at the end of 9 innings Fungoes finally win it with a walk off single by Eric Hosmer in the 14th inning.  Hanrahan takes the loss for the Tweeners while Perkins picks up the win for the Fungoes. 

 

Game 2 April 25:

David Price throws a complete game shutout as the Fungoes win it 6-0.  Geo Gonzalez goes the distance taking the loss for the Tweeners.  Salvator Perez picks up 3 hits and drives in 3 for the Fungoes.  Price strikes out 14.

 

Game 3 July 16:

Another extra inning game and another 5-4 Fungo win.  Eric Young hits a walkoff single in the 11th inning.  Felix Hernandez takes the loss while Papelbon picks up the win in relief for the Fungoes.

 

Game 4  July 17:

Kershaw weaves a masterpiece going the distance while allowing only 2 hits.  Fungoes win it 5-1.  Madbum takes the loss for the Tweeners.  NORM's manager was upset after the game.  'I don't like to complain but did you see that umpires strike zone?', he said.  'Maybe they ought to start calling the strike zone the way it's printed in the rule book.'

 

Game 5 July 18:

Tweeners finally get to see a Righthander and they take advantage ripping Porcello a new one!  Tweeners win it 9-5, sending the home crowd home dragging their brooms!  Milone gets the complete game win for the Tweeners!

 

WTF

Warpigs 5, SuperGoofs 2

Dice and cards.

Gm1 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 11-5. Encarnacion hammered two homers to back the pitching of Hellickson (11-5). Prado and Fielder also homered for the Pigs.

Gm2 - @ The BallPork - Goofs win 11-6. The Goofs hit 6 homers. All 5 of the Pig pitchers gave up at least 1 tater. Brandon Phillips broke the 6-6 tie with a 3-run shot in the 7th.

Gm3 - @ Goofy World - Goofs win 4-3 in 10 innings. Alexei Ramirez got the walk off double in the 10th, just missing a home run.

Gm4 - @ Goofy World - Pigs win 4-1. Adam Wainwright (13-2) got the win, Fernando Rodney the save. Prado, Freese, and Reimold homered for the Pigs. Shin Soo Choo performed the rare feat of striking out twice in the same inning when he accidently batted out of order, striking out for Pagan, then remaining at the plate to strike out for himself.

Gm5 - @ Goofy World - Pigs win 6-1. The Goof bats have definitely gone quiet now. Cliff Lee got the win to even his record at 7-7. Brad Ziegler went 4 innings for a save. Yoenis Cespedes homered.

Gm6 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 20-3. Yes, 20 runs on 26 hits, including 8 doubles and 7 home runs. Poor Matt Harrison allowed 15 earned runs in 5 innings. Yadier Molina, who was starting his only game of the day, went 5-5. Cliff Lee (8-7) threw a complete game for the win.

Gm7 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 5-2. Jordan Zimmermann (10-3) carried a perfect game into the 6th inning. The 5 Pig runs came on 4 homers. Fernando Rodney earned his 31st save with a perfect 9th.

Inmates 7, Nads 7

Inmates make the trek to Chicago, only to face an inhospitable, cheating Nad team.

 

NADS 9 – INMATES 4 (Baptist Bowl): Nads pound Santana for 8 runs and 11 hits. The game is never close.

 

NADS 4 – INMATES 2 (Baptist Bowl): Once again the Nads never trail. Billingsley took it in the rear this time.

 

INMATES 5 – NADS 4 (Baptist Bowl): Teixeira and Marte homer for all of the Inmate runs, but the Nads make it close.

 

NADS 4 – LDMF 3 (Baptist Bowl): Inmates jump out to 3-0 lead against Fister, then lie down and roll over. Nads score the game winner in the 9^th.

 

NADS 3 – INMATES 2 (10 innings – The Scrotum): Inmate pitchers blow a 2-0 lead (and each other); Nad managing strategy (!) wins it in the 10^th.

 

INMATES 7 – NADS 4 (The Scrotum): A 7-0 Inmate lead almost dissolves after the Nads score four in the 7^th. A Cargo tater turns out to be the game-winner.

 

NADS 1 – LDMF 0 (The Scrotum):  The Nads get only four hits but it’s enough as Fister and Balfour shut down the LDMF on 6 singles.

 

INMATES 8 – NADS 6 (Baptist Bowl): What appears to be a blow-out turns close in the 7^th. With an 8-2 lead but with the bases full of Nads (?), Inmates bring Grilli in to put out the fire. He throws one pitch that some nameless mother-fucker hit eleven miles for a grand slam. Fortunately for the Inmates, that was the end of the Nad scoring.

 

INMATES 9 – NADS 4 (Baptist Bowl): Inmates finally have control of a game from start to finish.

 

INMATES 10 – NADS 2 (Baptist Bowl): Floyd pitches a complete game, while the Inmates pound out 15 hits for the 2^nd consecutive game.

 

NADS 7 – INMATES 2 (The Scrotum): Nads score 5 in the first, including a grand slam by another nameless mother-fucker. The game is effectively over then.

 

INMATES 5 – NADS 4 (The Scrotum): It took eight Inmate pitchers and four Inmate homers, but the Beakless Chicken Gang holds on to even the series at 6 each.

 

INMATES 3 – NADS 0 (The Scrotum): Santana and the bullpen redeem themselves, handcuffing the Nads on 5 hits.

 

NADS 13 – INMATES 4 (The Scrotum): Nads hitters (except AGon, who sucked all series) torch Floyd for 5 runs on three homers in the 1^st. The Inmates manage to keep things close, but the Nads slam dunk 5 more in the 8^th for a season series split.

 

The HEAD INMATE

Zaps 7, FFTs 3

The FFTs finish their season BEFORE THE ALL STAR GAME! What the hell is going on here?!?

Pigs and FFTs make another trade

The Warpigs trade Dylan Bundy, Trevor Bauer, Lorenzo Cain, Martin Prado, and a reserve to the FFTs for Mike Leake and a 2nd round pick.

Fungoes 4, Zaps 1

Fungoes played five with the Zappers at WTF today.  Here are the results:

 

Game1 April 7:

Fungoes win it 6-1.  Johnson takes the loss for the Zappers while Jordan Lyles gets a complete game victory!  "I guess Lyles had a shot to put it in the face of those who traded him" said Fungo skipper Al Kaline.  "He kicked some big bad Zap ass today!"  Wieters hit a big 3-run homer in the 8th to put this one out of reach!

 

Game 2 April 8:

Fungoes take an early 5-1 lead and hold on to win 5-4.  Porcello picks up the win for the Fungoes while Papelbon picks up his 17th save.  Niese takes the complete game loss for the Zapper.

 

Game 3 June 29:

Zaps win this one 5-3.  Scherzer wiffs 12 and grabs the complete game victory for the Zappers.  Porcello is tagged with the loss for the Fungoes.  "Everything felt great" Scherzer
said. "I had a good fastball, I felt I could throw it by everybody tonight."

 

Game 4 June 30: 

Fungoes win this one easily 5-1.  Lyles once again shuts down the Zaps offense for the win.  Hanson takes the loss for the Zaps.  Mike Trout had 3 hits, 3 stolen bases and scored 3 times for the Fungoes.

 

Game 5 July 1:

Fungoes win again 3-1.  Garcia pitched well for the Zaps but is tagged with the loss while Medlen picks up the win for the Fungoes.  Papelbon picks up the save.  TRISTAN's manager was pretty down after the loss.  "We've lost four out of five to the crappy assed Fungoes!"  "That just won't get it done."

Warpigs 6, DVs 0

The electronic dice were falling the way of the Pig tonight. All games netplayed (with nary a glitch!).

Gm1 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 7-4. Strasburg the win, Rodney the save, Latos the loss. Pig homers by Schierholtz, Fielder, and Jackson.

Gm2 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 5-2. Zimmermann lost his shutout in the 9th, so Rodney came on to get another save. Jackson, Encarnacion, and Reimold homered for the Pigs. Weaver took the loss.

Gm3 - @ The BallPork - Pigs win 12-5. Maholm got Mahammered. Yadi had a homer and 5 RBI. Melky and Ruggiano each had 3 hits, including a homer. Wainwright wasn't great, but he got the win.

Gm4 - @ DV World - Pigs win 8-2. Latos was cruising along with a shutout into the 6th when the Warpigs exploded for 6 runs. Adam Wainwright was again the beneficiary of the run support. Brad Ziegler went 3 innings for the save. Ruggiano went 2/2 with a homer and 4 RBI.

Gm5 - @ DV World - Pigs win 4-3 in 11 innings. David Freese tied the game with a homer in the 7th, and the winning run scored on a 2-out single by Darwin Barney off of Jake McGee. Putz got the win. Rodney recorded his 29th save.

Gm6 - @ DV World - Pigs win 6-2. Strasburg got the win, and Maholm took the loss. Ruggiano had 3 hits including a homer. Encarnacion did him one better by hitting two homers. The highlight of the game - the nail in the coffin - the dagger of defeat - the height of humiliation - was a 1-1-1 HR roll by Brendan Ryan in the 7th inning.

In the last 4 games, Justin Ruggiano went 8/9 with 3 doubles, 3 homers, and 8 RBI.

Inmates 4, DVs 3

The Inmates rolled through Tulsa earlier this week and took 4 of 7 from the DVs.

Nothing overly notable in the series other than the DV’s starting pitching may be getting WORSE- which is hard to believe given that Hammel (6.18 ERA), Maholm (6.00) and Halladay (5.52) are about as bad as you can get. Give them a WS ring and they turn to crap.

Here are some samples – DVs lose game 1 with Hammel  = 6 IP, 11H, 5 ER, then DVs win games 2, 3 and 4 as Weaver and Latos pitch those and DVs score 21 runs across those 3 games. Then game 5 – Maholm 5 IP 11 hits, 7 ER; game 6 Halladay 5 IP, 10 hits, 6 ER are losses. Last game, Maholm actually goes 7 IP with 7 hits and 2 runs – and DVs lose 2-1 as Craig misses a 2 run BP HR chance (my park 1-15), then Holliday follows Craig and MISSES ANOTHER. Back-to-back piss on my leg, dang. But wait – it gets better. Craig up in the 6^th inning with a two run BP chance  - missed. And the coup d’état: Ramirez up in the 7^th with a runner on and rolls a 1-18 HR chance – and he MISSED IT TOO. Even The “I never get a freaking roll” Inmates admitted that was as crappy of luck as he’s seen. Somewhere the devil is doing a triple lutz followed by a double salchow. Frankly if the Inmates ever met a ball they didn’t want to swing at and drew some walks, it could have been worse as they only drew 12 walks in those 7 games.

Mavs 4, DVs 1

Mavs crush the hapless DVs taking 4 of 5.

G1 – A hit by pitch RBI by Chris Davis is the difference in the 8^th inning as the Mavs win 5-4 (Davis hit a HR too, a sign of things to come)

G2 – Mavs use 3 pitchers who give up 3 hits in a 4-0 win. Bailey gets the win on the same evening he throws his MLB no hitter.

G3 – Mavs run up 9 runs on Lance Lynn in 3 1/3 innings in a 11-4 blowout.

G4 – Mavs hit lots of homers and win going away 7-3

G5 – DVs muster all of 4 hits to eke out a 2-1 win as the clearly dis-interested Mavs start thinking about their playoff rotation.

Warpigs 5, Mavs 3

The Warpigs took 5 of 8 against the Mavs to split their season series 5-5.

Gm1 - @ The BallPork - Warpigs win 4-2. A 9th inning homer by Billy Butler ruined the shutout and made the game tight, but Darren Oliver came on to record his first save of the year. Yoenis Cespedes homered for the Pigs.

Gm2 - @ The BallPork - Warpigs win 2-1. Mav lefty Robbie Ross came into a 1-1 game in the bottom of the 9th, but couldn't record an out. Prince Fielder and Yadier Molina singled to start the inning. Cliff Lee pinch hit and dropped a sac bunt. The Mavs threw for the pinch runner Brendan Ryan at third, but the throw was late, loading the bases. Yoenis Cespedes drew a bases loaded walk to end the game; it was the only walk allowed by Mav pitchers in the game. Molina had homered in the 7th to end a shutout bid by Matt Cain.

Gm3 - @ The BallPork - Warpigs win 8-1. Clay Buchholz took a pounding, giving up homers to Prince Fielder and Nate Schierholtz. Jordan Zimmermann shut down the Mavs for 8 strong innings.

Gm4 - @ MavLand - Mavs win 5-3. Brandon Moss homered twice to back the pitching of Yovani Gallardo. Tom Wilhelmsen got the 2-inning save.

Gm5 - @ MavLand - Warpigs win 6-4 in 13 innings. Fernando Rodney blew a save in the 9th when David Dejesus hit a 3-run double to tie the game at 4. Rodney then switched gears into long reliever and got the win when little Brendan Ryan hit a 2-out triple in the top of the 13th.

Gm6 - @ MavLand - Warpigs win 11-3. The Pigs battered Phil Hughes early. Martin Prado hit 2 homers and Austin Jackson added 3 hits. Jordan Zimmermann got the complete game win.

Gm7 - @ The BallPork - Mavs win 5-3. The Warpigs (except for Schierholtz) could not figure out Gallardo. Chris Davis homered for the Mavs. Schierholtz homered twice in the losing effort.

Gm8 - @ The BallPork - Mavs win 9-0. Matt Cain threw a complete game, 3-hit shutout.

Goofs 3, FFTs 2

Game 1 Darvish gives up a home run, and Goofs can't hit Wandy for nothing. FFT's win 5-0

Game 2 Harrison stands his ground and the Goofs find their bats for a 4-2 win.

Game 3 Another shut out.  Masterson comes back with a vengeance, Lohse leads the Goofs to a loss with just one stupid drive through the drawn in infield.

Game 4 A good pitching match. Goofs hold the lead, and don't sweat until the 8th & 9th where the FFT's almost break ahead or tie. Tazawa seals the deal. Goofs win 3-2

Game 5 Darvish goes all 9 and it's almost a shut out, until Blanco slides a run in there.

 

Goofs wins series 3-2

State of the Association

As we reach the 4th of July - the virtual midway point of the season - the division races are heating up. Here's the rundown...

Bob Uecker Division - The Warpigs still have the best record in the league, but they're in a 2-month tailspin with no end in sight. The lead over the defending champion DVs is down to 7 games, and there's no guarantee the runner up in the BUD makes the post season. In the bottom half of the division standings, the FFTs lead the league in most games played. The Wahoos lead the league in most games NOT played.

Herman Wheeler Division - This division has the tightest race, with a tie for first currently between the Rhinos and Inmates. It's like they're traveling together in a barnstorming tour. Both teams were present at the WTF Invitational and the Pigapalooza in June, and both teams will be in Nashville later this month. They will be looking for someone to kick the crap out of. The Snakes will be there, right? The Fungoes are poised for a huge year in 2014. The Nads are... in the sack.

Millard Fillmore Division - The Mavs would be running away with the division, but the Buckeyes and Zaps are playing great ball themselves, making this an interesting race. The MFD could have anywhere from 1 to 3 teams in the playoffs. And the Drillers are setting themselves up for a big 2014 and is doing everything he can to earn the first pick in next year's draft.

Ab Wheeler Division - The runner up in the AWD is probably NOT a playoff team, so winning the division is a must. The SuperGoofs hold a 3 game lead over the Tweeners and have replaced the Nads for the league lead in emails not returned. The Bee Bash in Nashville should help clear up the picture in the AWD. The Tweeners, Bees, and Sidewinders will all be there, probably knocking hell out of each other, giving the Goofs more reasons to learn to roll playoff dice.

Wahoos Knock Inmates Out of First

INMATES 4 – WAHOOS 3 (Reservation): Pierzynski hit a pair of homers and Espinosa added one to outlast the ‘Hoos.

 

WAHOOS 5 – INMATES 4 (Baptist Bowl): Inmates strand the tying run on 2^nd in the last of the 9^th to come up short.

 

WAHOOS 10 – INMATES 9 (10 innings – Baptist Bowl): A wild one. Wahoos blast Norris for 6 runs in 3 innings to take a 6-0 lead. Inmates battle back with 1 in the 4^th, 2 in the 5^th, and 3 in the 6^th (capped by an Espinosa squeeze bunt) to tie it up, only to have the @#%$! Wahoos take a 9-6 lead into the last of the 9^th. The Inmates score 3 in the bottom of the inning, getting the leading run on 3^rd with one out only to strand him. Wilson “Eat My Ass” Betemit (!!!) hit a solo tater in the 10^th to put the Inmates behind again. In the bottom of the 10^th, the Inmates get runners on 2^nd and 3^rd with only one out. Both the IF and OF were in with Beltre and Cargo coming up. You guessed it – Heimlick-my-arse time and the Inmates lose 10-9.

 

The Head Inmate

Bees finally play some games...

Killer Bees 4, SuperGoofs 3
Killer Bees 3, Fungoes 2
Killer Bees 3, Mavs 2
Zaps 5, LDMF Bees 0

Fungoes 5, Nads 2

Fungoes and Nads finished up their season series with 7 games at WTF.  Here are the results:

 

Game 1, May 27 at WTF (Double header game one):

Fungoes break open a well pitched contest scoring 2 in the 6th inning and 2 in the 8th.  Fungoes win it 5-1.  Harvey picks up the win for the Fungoes while C J Wilson takes the loss for the Nads.  Derek Holland picks up a 3 inning save. 

 

Game 2, May 27 at WTF (Double header game two):

Fungoes complete the double header sweep winning game two 2-1.  Medlen gets the win while Fister takes the hard luck loss for the Nads.  Papelbon picks up the save for the Fungoes. 

 

Game 3, May 28 at WTF:

Fungoes win again 4-3 in a hard fought contest.  Dempster and Price were the starters but neither were around for the decisions.  Ernesto Frieri pickes up the win in relief while Collmenter takes the loss in relief for the Nads.  Papelbon picks up the save.  Ryan Zimmerman went yard for the Fungi.

 

Game 4, May 29 at WTF:

Fungoes take the early 3-0 lead but the Nads come back to lead it 4-3 in the 5th.  Fungoes break back out on top with a 4-spot in the bottom of the 5th to take a 7-4 lead.  Kershaw settles down and the Fungoes take the 8-6 win.  Estrada takes the loss for the Nads and Papelbon picks up save #16.  Trout hits a big homer for the Fungoes.

 

Game 5, September 9 at WTF:

Nads score 3 early runs and build up a 5-0 lead.  Too much for the Fungoes as the Nads win it 6-4.  Fister gets the win while Lyles takes the loss for the Fungoes.  Balfour gets the save for the Nads.  Frazier enjoys a 3 hit night for the Nads while Montero and Gonzalez both went yard! 

 

Game 6, September 10 at WTF:

Dempster shuts down the Fungoes and the Nads win this one 5-1.  Medlen takes the loss for the Fungoes.  Dempster throws a complete game 6 hitter and Frazier and Montero both homer for the Nads!

 

Game 7, September 11 at WTF:

Fungoes take an ealry lead and coast to an 8-3 win over the Nads.  Marcum takes the loss while Lincoln picks up the win for the Fungoes.  Holland picks up a 3 inning save for the WTF-ers!   The Fungi fans were thrilled by the performance put forth by Lincoln, but it was clearly his strikeouts that they enjoyed most. 'When he reached 10
strikeouts the fans showed him their appreciation with a loud cheer.' Fungo manager Al Kaline said following the game. 

 

Fungoes improve their record to 42-54

Nads 6, FFTs 4

One thing is “for sure” neither team will be in the playoffs – NADs 6 – FFTs 4

FFTS hit .227 against NADS

NADS hit .236 against FFTs

Pretty weak

Fungoes 5, FFTs 5

Fungoes and FFTs faced off in 10 mail games.  Here are the results:

 

Game one, May 8 at WTF:

FFTs jump out to a 3-0 lead in the first inning but the Fungoes score 6 over the next 4 innings winning this one 6-3.  Brad Lincoln gets the win while Wandy Rodriquez takes the loss for the FFTs.  Papelbon picks up the save for the Fungoes.

 

Game two, May 9 at WTF:

Fungoes win a tight pitching duel between Porcello and Masterson.  Fungoes win 3-1 with Porcello picking up his first win of the season!  Detwiler takes the loss in relief for the FFTs.  Papelbon picks up the save.

 

Game three, June 19 at FFTs:

FFTs bust out of their hitting slump banging out 13 hits in a 7-2 win over the Fungoes.  Leake takes the win for the FFTs while Porcello takes another loss for the Fungoes.  Camp picks up the save for the FFTs.  'Thankfully we got ourselves a win', head honcho Terry Miller said.  'It's great to be back on the winning side of things.'

 

Game four, June 20 at FFTs:

Fungoes win it big scoring early and often winning it 11-1.  David Price gets the win while Wandy Rodriquez takes another loss for the FFTs.  Fungoes bang out 17 hits while the FFTs are held to just 4.

 

Game five, June 21 at FFTs:

FFTs outscore the Fungoes in a close game winning it 3-1.  Kershaw takes the loss for the Fungoes while Detwiler picks up the win for the FFTs.  "Shitfuck, we can't seem to get it done out there!"  said Fungoes skipper Al Kaline!

 

Game six, July 31 at WTF:

Fungoes "get it done" this time winning it 3-2.  Porcello picks up win number 2 for the Fungoes while Masterson takes the hard luck loss for the FFTs.  Papelbon picks up save number 13 on the season for the Fungoes.

 

Game seven, August 1 at WTF:

Kuroda throws a complete game five hit masterpiece for the FFTs as they win it 5-1.  Brad Lincoln takes the loss for the Fungoes.  Puhols drives in 3 with a double and a homer for the winners.

 

Game eight, August 2 at WTF:

Leake, Liriano and Belsario combine on a shutout and the FFTs even the series at 4 wins each winning this one 3-0.  Kershaw takes another loss for the Fungoes. 

 

Game nine, September 1 at FFTs:

Fungoes win this one going away 7-1.  Medlen picks up the win for the Fungoes while Wandy Rodriques takes another loss for the FFTs.

 

Game ten, September 2 at FFTs:

Fungoes Papelbon blows the save in the ninth and the FFTs evantually win it in the tenth inning in walkoff fashion as Hanley Ramirez smacked a bases loaded single for the FFTs. 

 

FFTs and Fungoes split these ten games.

 

Fungoloid

Goofs 4, Sidewinders 3

Game 1 Harrison makes the manager sweat in first inning, but he was just goofing. But Peavy learned that you don't mess with Choo when Josh is at bat.

Game 2 Villa "Double Play" nueva pitched a great game.

Game 3 snakes win 5-2...but you were sweating.

Game 4 Lohse gives the Snakes false hope in the first inning and then mows them down like tall weeds through to the 9th.

Game 5 the sidewinders plow 5 homeruns (3 from Mauer) and Goofs just struggle to survive.

Game 6 Lohse comes back and let's the Snakes slither over every single base, but he DOES NOT  LET THEM GO HOME.

Game 7 Snakes win.

Goofs 4 Snakes 3

Goof 3, Nads 2

Game 1 "Go  Nads!", the nads keep hitting and Goofs kept missing.

 

Game 2 The former Goof Marcum started the charge back at his old stomping grounds which ended up bringing every Goof off the bench and onto the field at one point or another, as they make a great come back from 3-0 to 6-3.

 

Game 3 Villanueva almost brings it home, but Goofs brought Tazawa to close the 6-4 game.

 

Game 4 the Harrison/Dempster rematch, led the goofs to no victory, again.

 

Game 5 Goofs win a the Villanueva & Tazawa shut out with the only run made was a SUICIDE SQUEEZE.

 

Goofs win 3 Nads win 2

Pigapalooza Results

Warpigs 7, FFTs 7
Warpigs 2, Rhinos 1
Inmates 5, Mavs 5
Inmates 2, Wahoos 0
Mavs 7, Rhinos 3
Wahoos 4, FFTs 0
Rhinos 9, FFTs 1

Mavs/Inmates

Great series – most games close and tough.

 

INMATES 3 – MAVS 2 (MavDome): Both teams scored all of their runs in the 1^st, then the bullpens shut everything down.

 

MAVS 3 – INMATES 1 (MavDome): Mavs pound out 11 hits, including two homers, but score only three runs. That’s enough to beat the LDMF.

 

INMATES 8 – MAVS 3 (MavDome): Inmate lumber finally wakes up. Rizzo, Parra, and Pierzynski all tater. Homer Bailey is an Inmate in disguise.

 

MAVS 4 – INMATES 1 (13 Innings – Baptist Bowl): A pitcher’s duel until Perez implodes in the 13^th, allowing three runs. Mavs get 15 hits all together and leave 136 on base…

 

MAVS 7 – INMATES 4 (Baptist Bowl): Santana allows three homers before being mercifully lifted after the 3^rd, but it’s too late for the Inmates to catch up. A Beltre 3-run homer in the 9^th makes the game look closer than it really was.

 

MAVS 5 – INMATES 4 (MavDome): Another close game, but the Inmates lose their 3^rd straight.

 

INMATES 8 – MAVS 4 (MavDome): Three Inmate taters (Cargo, Beltre and Jones) give the Inmates a comfortable win.

 

INMATES 5 – MAVS 3 (Baptist Bowl): Rios and Rizzo homer in the Inmate 1^st, then the Beakless Chicken Gang hang on for the win. Homer (“Incognito Inmate”) Bailey takes the loss.

 

INMATES 5 – MAVS 4 (Baptist Bowl): The Mavs jump out to a 4-0 lead as Santana continues to struggle with the gopher ball, but Cargo and Teixeira (twice) homer for the Inmates to come from behind.

 

MAVS 8 – INMATES 7 (Baptist Bowl): A great game. The Inmates take an early 6-1 lead, but the Mavs battle back. Inmate closer Street comes into the game in the 9^th and gives up a homer to someone (I forgot the motherfucker’s name) and the Mavs salvage a split.

 

The HEAD INMATE

 

Inmates/Wahoos

What a massacre…

 

INMATES 20 – WAHOOS 9 (Reservation): Wahoos pound out 9 runs on 13 hits, normally enough to win big. Not today. Inmates bring out the big artillery and get 24 hits. Beltre and Pierzynski both tater twice; Espinosa and Rios each add one for good measure. The ‘Hoos 3-0 1^st inning lead evaporated after the BC Gang scored 6 in the 2^nd.

 

INMATES 13 – WAHOOS 4 (Reservation): The Inmates blast 22 more hits. Forsythe hits two homers, Rios adds another, and it was never close.

 

The HEAD INMATE

2014 Picks

I will post the trades from last year in the archives, but here is a list of 2014 picks that have been dealt...

PIG3 >>> FFT
GPB5 >>> WAH
GPB Res >>> BEE
RHI1 >>> WAH
RHI2 >>> WAH
PIG1 >>> WAH
PIG2 >>> WAH
GPB2 >>> MAV
MAV3 >>> GPB
GPB4 >>> WAH
WAH9 >>> GPB
GPB1 >>> LCT
LCT5 >>> SSW
SSW1 >>> WAH
BEE Res >>> SSW
PIG6 >>> NAD
BEE Res >>> INM
INM Res >>> RHI
RHI3 >>> INM
RHI5 >>> GPB
RHI8 >>> SSW
ZAP8 >>> INM
OUD8 >>> ZAP
DVS7 >>> BEE

Let me know if I've missed any.

Inmates 5, Rhinos 2

Despite the lopsided W/L record, all games were close and could have gone either way.

 

INMATES 5 – RHINOS 4 (10 innings – Baptist Bowl): Rhinos jump out to a 4-0 lead thanks to a pair of homers by Avila, but the Inmates chip away and finally tie the game on a Cargo tater in the 5^th. Fast-forward to the bottom of the 10^th. Venters gives up a 2-out single to Cargo. O’Day comes in to pitch to Beltre, who promptly hit a triple to end the game.

 

INMATES 7 – RHINOS 6 (Baptist Bowl): Rhinos lead 6-2 after five before the Inmate comeback. O’Day gives up the game-winner again as Cargo hit a run-scoring 2B in the 8^th to ice the game.

 

INMATES 4 – RHINOS 3 (12 innings - Baptist Bowl): Rhinos shoot their wad in the 5^th, scoring all of their runs. Espinosa taters leading off the bottom of the 12^th for the Inmate win. Oh yeah, O’Day gives up the game-winner again.

 

RHINOS 4 – INMATES 2 (Rhino Reserve – DH Game 1): O’Day doesn’t pitch, Garza throws a 3-hitter, and the Rhinos win the first game of a doubleheader. Parra led off the game with a homer, which was the only lead the Inmates had. Garza and Santana both toss CGs.

 

INMATES 2 – RHINOS 0 (Rhino Reserve – DH Game 2): Parker and three relievers combine on a 5-hitter to shutout the horned ones. Sabathia tosses a 4-hitter, but Jones hit one of them into the seats. DH split.

 

INMATES 4 – RHINOS 2 (14 innings – Rhino Reserve): Both benches and bullpens are depleted in this one. Rhinos tie the game 2-2 after a Hanigan passed ball allows a run to score. 72 hours later the Inmate bats wake up with two out in the 14^th to pin the loss on Jansen, who pitched 5 innings of relief.

 

RHINOS 5 – INMATES 2 (Rhino Reserve): Norris gets blasted for five runs on nine hits and four walks; the Inmates can’t catch up.

 

The HEAD INMATE

Rhinos 10, Fungoes 4

Game stories coming (maybe).

Warpigs 2, Fungoes 2

Cards and dice at WTF...

Gm 1 @ WTF Field - Fungoes win 6-1. The Fungoes homered 5 times, including 2 by Trout. Porcello got the win, holding the Pigs to 7 hits.

Gm 2 @ WTF Field - Warpigs win 12-0. This was one of the most enjoyable and amazing games the Pigs have ever had. First of all, Jeremy Hellickson still had a no-hitter with 1 out in the 8th. He finished with a 3-hit shutout. But the most unusual thing was the offense. The Warpig batters hammered 7 homers, THREE of which were ballpark homers (HR 1, flyout 2-20). Yadier Molina hit 2 of the ballpark homers. Edwin Encarnacion had 2 regular homers. Even little Darwin Barney hit one out when he rolled 5-9 off of Steve Delabar for a solid N-HR.(Yes, Barney has N-power vs RHP. I know, I was shocked too.)

Gm 3 @ The BallPork - Fungoes win 5-0. We score 12 in WTF, then turn around and get shutout in the BallPork. Weird. But then, Kris Medlen is pretty hard to hit.

Gm 4 @ The BallPork - Warpigs win 7-4. To quote the Zapper, "You can't throw lefties against me!" Four different Pigs hit homers. Adam Wainwright got the win. Fernando Rodney, in his only appearance of the day (9 games), gets his 20th save.

The Warpigs finish the season 6-4 against the Fungoes.

Inmates 3, Warpigs 2

Cards and dice at WTF...

The visiting team won every game.

Gm 1 @ The BallPork - Inmates win 5-4. After the Pigs came from behind to tie the game on a John Jaso 3-run homer in the 6th, some fucking Inmate homered in the 7th off Strasburg. Whatever.

Gm 2 @ The BallPork - Inmates win 2-1. Neither team did much. Inmates scored 2 early. Big fucking deal.

Gm 3 @ The BallPork - Inmates win 3-2. I thought this was supposed to be a hitter's ballpark! It was 2-2 to the 9th when the Warpig bullpen gave up their only run of the whole fucking series (including the next two games!). We lost. They won. Whatthefuckever.

Gm 4 @ The Baptist Bowl - Warpigs win 9-1. I'll tell you what the key was... Beginning this game, the Pigman started playing STANDING UP. Made all the difference. The other big change was inserting Darwin Barney in the starting lineup. Barney had 3 hits including a triple. He knocked in a run and stole a base. The Pigs had 13 hits and scored in 5 different innings. Hellickson got the win. O'Flaherty somehow managed 3 innings of relief for a save.

Gm 5 @ The Baptist Bowl - Warpigs win 8-3. Ruggiano hit a 2-run homer in the 1st and a 3-run homer in the 2nd. That was enough. Melky Cabrera had 4 hits. Zimmermann got the win.

DVs 5, FFTs 5

DVs and FFTs hooked up for a rather mundane 10 game series (first 3 at DVs, final 7 in Albert’s Palace of Malice) as the US Open plays in the background.

Game 1 – Paul Maholm spins a complete gem, giving up 31 hits and 20 runs in a 20-5 FFT drubbing. Maholm was on early, giving up 7 in the first and 8 in the second (FFT manager went for two to rub it in), and the bullpen laughed and wept in this Greek tragedy. Interesting part is that the FFTs will only score 18 runs in the following 9 games (!).

2 – DVs return the favor, with Halladay going the distance in a 10-0 DV complete game victory

3 – DVs win 8-2

4 – DVs win 4-1

5 – DVs win 2-1

6,7,8 and 9 – DVs lose all 4 – three of them by 2-1 and another 4-2. Game 7 was a walk off Albert tater against Jake McGee (and it wasn’t rolled on McGee’s card)

10 – DVs win 7-4

Zaps 4, DVs 1

DVs lay down against the left coasters with a pitiful performance as the Zaps take 4 of 5. Most games weren’t even close as the EQA came in handy. Scherzer won games 2 and 4, but the Zaps offense was the big story.

Scores were-

Game 1 Zaps 11-3

G 2 Zaps 7-6

G 3 DVs 9-8

G 4 Zaps 11-4

G 5 Zaps 5-2

DVs 2, Nads 0

DVs win final 2 games of the season series with the Nads , 5-2 in the first game and 4-3 in the second as Granderson has a walk off triple.

Baby Pics!

DVs as a baby!

Head Inmate as a baby!

DVs 3, Killer Bees 2 - and a trade

DVs win 3 of 5 at their humble abode- here are the scores:

Game 1 – The Bees had noted with their instructions to “have fun beating up our crappy pitching” – which the DVs took to heart by scoring 4 in the first and third against a hapless James McDonald while romping to a 12-4 win.

Game 2 – DVs let up slightly only scoring 6 runs in the first 4 innings in hammering Joe Blanton in a 7-2 win.

Game 3 – A reporter in the press box noted that the DVs Roy Halladay was “bad enough he could be a stud for the Bees”, and he lived up to that reputation as the Bees won 10-5 as Tim Lincicum wins easily.

Game 4 – McDonald pitches better, but the DVs scratch out 2 late runs against the bullpen in a 4-3 thriller.

Game 5 – Blanton gets the last laugh as he twirls a 6 hit, 2-0 shutout.

 

More importantly, the Bees and DVs pull off a gigantic trade as Todd Helton makes his way home in exchange for a 2014 7^th. We hope the Bees use that pick to take a pitcher that even the Inmates would ignore.