Congratulations to the Club Champ!

Our own little DV was recently crowned club champ at the LaFortune Golf Course, shooting back to back scores of 71-65.

There was no report of whether he was allowed to use the ladies' tees or how he did on the hole with the windmill.

Albert Pujols

He hit #400 tonight. Third youngest ever.

As he heads toward the end of his 10th ML season, here are some numbers...

This will be his 10th straight season with .300 BA, 30 HR, and 100 RBI - all to start a career. He's never NOT accomplished this.
Rookie of the Year.
A World Series title.
A batting title.
A HR title.
3 MVP Awards.
4 Runs scored titles.
A Gold Glove.
9 time All Star.
Roberto Clemente Award.
5 Silver Sluggers.
More walks than strikeouts in every season except his rookie year.
In the same number of seasons, he has actually struck out less than Ichiro AND hit for a higher BA.

And I'm just cherry-picking here, but in his first nine seasons, these are the WORST seasonal stats he's had:
Games: 143 (2006)
AB: 524 (2008)
Runs: 99 (2007)
Doubles: 33 (2006)
Homers: 32 (2007)
RBI: 103 (2007)
Walks: 69 (2001)
BA: .314 (2002)
OBP: .394 (2002 - his only year under .400)
SLG: .561 (2002)
OPS: .955 (2002 - one of only two years under 1.000)

I contend that we are watching the greatest right handed hitter to ever play the game.

And yes, I know it's too early to judge his career, but even at (almost) ten seasons, his numbers put him right there in the discussion with the likes of Rogers Hornsby, Willie Mays, Hank Aaron, Frank Robinson, Honus Wagner, Jimmie Foxx, Al Simmons, Joe DiMaggio, Alex Rodriguez, Manny Ramirez, and Frank Thomas.

Nads at Wahoos

Nads 3, Hoos 2

From the Chief...

Wahoos win the first two of the five in two close games (7-3 and 4-2). Ending Game 1 was a Miguel Montero getting hit with a batted ball by Dan Uggla (or was it the other way around on the names). Game 3 went 12 innings and the Wahoos lose 10-9. Game 4 was more of the same as the Wahoos lose in 12, 10-9. Game 5 had a familiar feel. Nads score 10 more and Wahoos get 6.

Johnny Damon had a 5-hit game in one of the 12-inning games. Wahoos also had 19 hits in a loss.

August winding down...

Wahoos, Inmates, and Rhinos are a few games short of the 120 game goal. You still have a week, though. Get 'r done!

Sidewinders at VuvuZelas

Uvulas 3, Snakes 1

From the Zapper...

*

Well, you know by now there will be no game report from the Zapper. Everybody else in the league sends SOMETHING. Game scores... short or long game stories... but not the Zapper. Not a word. Nothing. Nada. Well, except for the asterisk. That's all that was in his e-mail. Again. Not even so much as game scores, because he's determined to be the bigger prick. But ask anybody who knows me, I CAN BE A MUCH BIGGER PRICK!

Seriously, this is the longest I have ever seen a guy stay on the rag. Hey commish, shouldn't there be demerits for not reporting results correctly? lol. I have no doubt that he sees this as his own personal FUCK YOU to the Pigs, but let's face it: If he won't take part in trying to make this a fun league, he's saying fuck you to all of us.

When a guy quits, don't we have to have a league vote to let him back in? We did it with the Pilots. We did it with the Nads. We SHOULD have had a vote on the Zaps. Now THAT would have been an interesting vote.

I'm sorry if my speaking up has made any of you uncomfortable. Oh, sure, it would be easier to just keep my mouth shut and let the little girl bleed. But hey, I'm just gonna have some fun at her expense until she comes to her senses and offers a sincere apology to all of us.

Or quits again.

VuvuZelas at Wahoos

Wahoos 3, Zelas 2

From the Chief...

Wahoos split the first two games losing Game 1, 4-1, and winning Game 2, 6-5, in walk-off fashion. A Parra single was the difference.

Zaps whip us 6-3 in Game 3.

Travis Hafner's grand slam lifts us in Game 4, 5-2. Kyle Lohse had a no-no into the sixth in Game 5 and we hold on to win, 6-1.

Inmates vs Sidewinders

SSW 4, Inmates 1

From The HEAD INMATE...

Snakes pummeled Inmates buttocks today:

Snakes 6 – Inmates 1 (Snake Pit) DH game 1: Inmates make 3 errors and managed one run on a Chipper Jones homer. Zambrano shuts Beakless Chicken Gang on 5 hits.

Snakes 2 – Inmates 0 (Snake Pit) DH game 2: Santana pitches a complete game loss as 5 Snake pitchers hold the Dickless Wonders to 2 hits.

Inmates 4 – Snakes 3 (14 innings)(Snake Pit): Beltre’s single in the top of the 14^th pushed the Inmates over the top. A one-run Inmate lead in the 10^th was erased when Kubel (cheatin’ bastage) hit his second homer of the game.

Snakes 6 – Inmates 0 (Baptist Bowl): Danks throws 4-hit shutout. ‘Nuf said.

Snakes 1 – Inmates 0 (11 innings)(Baptist Bowl): 5 Snake pitchers hand the Inmates their 3^rd shutout of the series. Inmates manage only 3 hits. Shitfuck.

Mavs at SuperGoofs

Goofs 5, Mavs 0

From Goofy...

April 9 Goofs 5 Mavs 3 - Blackburn goes 8 strong innings and Broxton gets the save. Alexi Ramirez and Thome hit HR's

April 10 Goofs 3 Mavs 1 - Borbon wiht a pinch hit 2 run HR in 8th for the win

July 6 Goofs 7 Mavs 4 - Blackburn win and Broxton save again. Choo hit a 3 run homer off Cain and Ramirez hits a 2 run HR late for insurance

July 7 Goofs 2 Mavs 1 - Goofs get 2 in 2nd on hits by Pence and Church. Zito, Clippard, and Broxton hold Mavs to 2 hits

July 8 Goofs 10 Mavs 1 - Church 5 RBI's including a grand slam

Rhinos at VuvuZelas

Rhinos 3, Vuvs 2

From the Zapper...










.

DVs vs Inmates

DVs 3, Inmates 2

From The HEAD INMATE...

Inmates and DVs played WeirdBall for our last five:

INMATES 12 – DVs 11 (Tulsa): A classic softball game highlighted by a pair of Adam Dunn homers for the Inmates. Time just ran out before more runs scored. Inmate defense (?) makes 3 errors and allows numerous hits.

DVs 9 – INMATES 8 (Tulsa): In a takeoff on recent Inmate/Buckeye games, the DVs win on an Ordonez walk-off single in the last of the 9^th, aided by an Inmate error. Dunn hits two more taters.

INMATES 7 – DVs 2 (Baptist Bowl): Anderson wins despite allowing 8 hits and 6 walks in 7 2/3. Beltre drives in 3 and the DVs fizzle out.

DVs 9 – INMATES 4 (Baptist Bowl): Another humdinger of a snoozer as the DVs totally out-class the Beakless Chicken Gang.

DVS 2 – INMATES 1 (Baptist Bowl): Pitching finally kicks in, but Inmate lack of defense plays another big part in snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Byrd tater is the winning hit for the DVs, after Inmates allow unearned run in 6^th.

And from Beatrice and the VD Girls...

Game 1 @DVs – Inmates kick the crap out of Halladay – win 12-11, Dunn hits 2 HRs

Game 2 @DVs - DVs win in the 9^th 9-8 in another softball game as Magglio Ordonez walks off with an RBI single. Dunn hits 2 more HRs.

Game 3 @inmates – Brett Anderson pitches well and Inmates keep hitting with a 7-2 win

Game 4 @Inmates – Halladay wins his 20^th in a 9-4 win

Game 5 @Inmates – Finally a normal game in the new “age of the pitcher” as the DVs win 2-1.

Old Yearbooks

I have extra copies of yearbooks from 1998, 1999, and 2007. If, for some reason, you want one, let me know and I will put it in the mail.

The Vanishing Error

I watched today as Robinson Cano hit a 2-hopper to second in the bottom of the 8th inning. The fielder moves a step to his right and fields in cleanly with plenty of time to throw to first for the out. But as he transfers the ball from glove to throwing hand, he drops it and it rolls several feet behind him. Official scorer? Base hit.

Official scorers should not in a position where they feel forced to make calls one way or another. Make the hitters earn their hits. Hold fielders accountable for what they do and don't do on the field. They are judges and their calls should be considered unbiased. Players and managers can appeal, but the scorers should never feel pressured or obligated to make calls favoring the home team and its stars.

It's nothing new, of course. I can remember a Ranger game where the official scorer rightfully gave an error on a hard hit ball to second by Juan Gonzalez. The call cost Juan a hit and an RBI. Gonzalez spent the rest of the game (which just happened to be one of the greatest comebacks ever by the Rangers) yelling and gesturing up at the press box. He cared much less about his team's efforts than he did about his numbers. The scorer eventually changed it to a hit to keep Juan from further Roid rage. Pitiful.

Some good news, though. Last week in a Ranger game, Ian Kinsler was given an error on a ball he never got within 15 feet of touching. A steal of second caught Kinsler napping. Nobody covered second and the runner easily made it to third on the throw. Initially, the error was given to Molina, whose throw was right on the bag. Of course, the scorer had no way of knowing which fielder was responsible for the bag (Andrus didn't cover either). Maybe Molina wasn't even supposed to throw the ball. It took a call from the Ranger dugout to get it changed. That's the way it's supposed to work.

Tweeners at DVs

DVs 2, Tweeners 0

From Nancy...

Despite some netplay hiccups that are clearly linked to Strato’s inferior code, the DVs took 2 from the Tweeners at the DV Hospice.

Game one saw Roy Halladay run his record to 19-7 with an 8-4 win, and in game 2 Scott Kazmir and a couple of relievers held the Tweeners at bay with a 3-1 win.

The series will continue at a yet to be determined location which Dr. Kovarkian selects.

VuvuZelas at Tweeners

Zelas 2, Tweeners 1

From Al Davis...

Tweeners drop 2 of 3 at home to finish the season series vs. Zaps. Game one was a good one; Utley's 8th inning homer off K-Rod tied it (HR 1-3, fly), but in the bottom half Zobrist comes off the bench for the pinch-hit BPHR (1-5) off Kuo. Howell saves the 4-3 win. Wainwright and Hernandez both lose again in games 2 and 3 by scores of 7-5 and 7-6.

Rhinos vs Drillers

Drillers 7, Rhinos 3

From Colonel Rhino...
Rhinos go 3-7 vs Drillers. Details to follow.

Nads at Mavs

Nads 6, Mavs 1

From the Mavman...

Another week, another asskicking. Nads take six of seven.

May 1 1-3
May 2 0-1
May 3 5-8
May 4 1-3

July 26 4-3
July 27 1-8
July 28 4-5